Eating Disorders Support Group
Eating disorders are marked by an obsessive need to control the intake and/or purging of food. This community is dedicated to those struggling on the road to recovery. Join to discuss your experience with others and find support. Get advice, ask questions, and meet others who are going through similar struggles.
I'm already under the Bipolar, Self-Injury and BPD groups and now here I am in the Eating Disorder group.
Last Friday I went to see my therapist after having had severe suicidal thoughts and self-harmed the previous night after eating some veg. Obviously there was more that played into it but that is what triggered off the main freak out.
Anyway to cut a long story short, I've had problems with self hate, body image and weight for over a year now and it's just reached it's peak now. My therapist has always been aware there was a problem but I never wanted to talk about it. It was Thursday night which changed that, I scared myself with the suicidal thoughts being so strong and I ended up self-harming the worst I'd ever done....over veg!? I know there is a problem and I'm willing to admit it now. I talked openly to my pdoc on Friday and we've agreed to try and get me admitted under the NHS to an eating disorder unit. The hospital I go to for my psychiatric appointments is the same hospital I was admitted to for the Bipolar. It's their sister hospital so at least I know their care is really good. My therapist also used to go and visit there from time to time so he knows it's nice there too.
Not exactly cut short but there you have it...Friday I was officially diagnosed with Anorexia...
I want the help but I'd be lying if I said I'm not scared. I'm terrified at the thought of having to put all that weight back on. But at the same time...I feel ill. One part of my head is just contantly arguing with the other part.
x-Bliss-x
Last Friday I went to see my therapist after having had severe suicidal thoughts and self-harmed the previous night after eating some veg. Obviously there was more that played into it but that is what triggered off the main freak out.
Anyway to cut a long story short, I've had problems with self hate, body image and weight for over a year now and it's just reached it's peak now. My therapist has always been aware there was a problem but I never wanted to talk about it. It was Thursday night which changed that, I scared myself with the suicidal thoughts being so strong and I ended up self-harming the worst I'd ever done....over veg!? I know there is a problem and I'm willing to admit it now. I talked openly to my pdoc on Friday and we've agreed to try and get me admitted under the NHS to an eating disorder unit. The hospital I go to for my psychiatric appointments is the same hospital I was admitted to for the Bipolar. It's their sister hospital so at least I know their care is really good. My therapist also used to go and visit there from time to time so he knows it's nice there too.
Not exactly cut short but there you have it...Friday I was officially diagnosed with Anorexia...
I want the help but I'd be lying if I said I'm not scared. I'm terrified at the thought of having to put all that weight back on. But at the same time...I feel ill. One part of my head is just contantly arguing with the other part.
x-Bliss-x
It took me three years to finally admit to myself that I had a problem, and I was afraid too in the beginning. But after a while, its really worth it, you know? Its scary and hard, but it gets easier.
I wish you all the best and if you ever need to takl or vent, I'm here to listen. :]
It's hard to open up but I couldn't really hide it very well anyway as I live with my Mum and Brother both who I'm VERY close too and I was already seeing a pdoc every week for my Bipolar. He could see what was happening but just had to wait for me to open up to him before he could do anything about it.
I would ask, but I just wouldn't talk about any of it. I'm glad I found the strength though.
x-Bliss-x
I'm glad you did too. :]
Mhm, its very hard to open up. For me, it was something personal, something no one needed to know about me unless I said so.
But I promise you it gets easier as time goes by. Some days, I can't wait to see my therpaist and just talk about what's been going on.
I'm happy you found the strength to ask for help. and despite how corny it may sound, I'm proud of you. :]
x-Bliss-x
and because you understand you need help, I'm sure you'll be alright and you'll get through this.