Eating Disorders Support Group
Eating disorders are marked by an obsessive need to control the intake and/or purging of food. This community is dedicated to those struggling on the road to recovery. Join to discuss your experience with others and find support. Get advice, ask questions, and meet others who are going through similar struggles.
Today, my brother and his wife came over, and we got to talking about things, and one thing that came up was my niece.
Well, she's in fifth grade. I guess this is the time when people start caring about their looks. She's already started getting up early to do her hair, and she knows more about make-up than me. There's nothing "wrong" with this, but it just concerns me because she's told me before she doesn't feel pretty, and that's why she wears make-up. It's one thing to want to wear it, but to feel like you need to? I don't think it's good.
But something major that came up today was the fact that she and her mom watch "Dance Moms," and lately she's been coming up to her mother, lifting up her shirt, and asking if she's ready for a bikini yet.
I said that's really sad, really bad, but they all just kinda blew me off and started to talk about food (which kinda sent me out the door-huge trigger for me), and when I brought it up to my mom and grandmother, they laughed. They said that I should get it, I know what self-image is like.
Well, DUH.
I also know (unlike them) how badly a low self-image can mess you up. I started hating my body/myself in fifth grade, too. They never noticed. I don't want my niece to get as bad as I have, to feel as alone as I do, to do the things I've done.
I know I could be over-reacting, but it just really, really scares me.
Well, she's in fifth grade. I guess this is the time when people start caring about their looks. She's already started getting up early to do her hair, and she knows more about make-up than me. There's nothing "wrong" with this, but it just concerns me because she's told me before she doesn't feel pretty, and that's why she wears make-up. It's one thing to want to wear it, but to feel like you need to? I don't think it's good.
But something major that came up today was the fact that she and her mom watch "Dance Moms," and lately she's been coming up to her mother, lifting up her shirt, and asking if she's ready for a bikini yet.
I said that's really sad, really bad, but they all just kinda blew me off and started to talk about food (which kinda sent me out the door-huge trigger for me), and when I brought it up to my mom and grandmother, they laughed. They said that I should get it, I know what self-image is like.
Well, DUH.
I also know (unlike them) how badly a low self-image can mess you up. I started hating my body/myself in fifth grade, too. They never noticed. I don't want my niece to get as bad as I have, to feel as alone as I do, to do the things I've done.
I know I could be over-reacting, but it just really, really scares me.
suzieann
That is not over reacting at ALL. We know exactly how an ED begins & those comments she is making is so dangerous. All I can say is thank goodness she has you to watch over her & to talk to!!!
deleted_user
That's so sad, what's happening to your niece. But what's really cool is that you could be the difference in keeping that girl from being here in 5 years fighting the same breakdowns and issues. I feel like we know better than anyone that no one deserves to go down the self-hate spiral. So maybe get an excuse to have a little one on one time with her every now and then and help keep her grounded and boost her self-image. Or give her some books- there are great ones out there about being healthy and natural and happy with yourself.. I don't know, I just do not think you are overreacting at all.
Join the Conversation
-
My 6mo twin DD's are EBF and just started rice cereal on the first. Everything has been going fine except this morning one of them had a diaper rash (lots of redness around her anus). I read this as one of the signs of an allergy. BUT I did just buy a different brand diaper yesterday (which they have used randomly before w/no issues). Do you think its the cereal or the diaper? Im ready to start...