Eating Disorders Support Group
Eating disorders are marked by an obsessive need to control the intake and/or purging of food. This community is dedicated to those struggling on the road to recovery. Join to discuss your experience with others and find support. Get advice, ask questions, and meet others who are going through similar struggles.
I realize eating disorders are just as much mental as they are physical, so I know it's quite unheard of for a complete cessation of both actions and thoughts. Even in the recovering, or recovered, one or even both may remain, but at a much smaller level and degree. I digress.
For those on the road, what have you used to motivate you? Do you feel motivation has to be internal...or at least mostly so? Or are there instances when external factors can assist.
I've been to treatment, twice, and while in treatment, I was compliant (as I want terribly to rid myself of my illnesses), and found the group sessions and understanding of others helpful. I guess...that's external.
But now...I mean...I have a job, an apartment, bills to pay, so I thought that would be motivation to get rid of the bulimia aspect, in that I wouldn't be spending massive amounts of money on food. But....it really hasn't. A lot of times I don't keep food around my apartment, th inking it's "safe", but then I end up severely restricting and just ending up in a binge/purge episode.
I thought my girlfriend, one with whom I"ve shared my issues would be a motivator. To save money that would be spent on binges to do things with and for her. To be healthy for her, to not be a sick individual.
I do keep these things all in mind, and journal about them, my feelings, etc. but when I fail to stop my engaging of disordered behaviors, I feel tenfold worse, as if I've let down myself, my girlfriend, my family, and even my workplace and ability to thrive in society.
For those on the road, what have you used to motivate you? Do you feel motivation has to be internal...or at least mostly so? Or are there instances when external factors can assist.
I've been to treatment, twice, and while in treatment, I was compliant (as I want terribly to rid myself of my illnesses), and found the group sessions and understanding of others helpful. I guess...that's external.
But now...I mean...I have a job, an apartment, bills to pay, so I thought that would be motivation to get rid of the bulimia aspect, in that I wouldn't be spending massive amounts of money on food. But....it really hasn't. A lot of times I don't keep food around my apartment, th inking it's "safe", but then I end up severely restricting and just ending up in a binge/purge episode.
I thought my girlfriend, one with whom I"ve shared my issues would be a motivator. To save money that would be spent on binges to do things with and for her. To be healthy for her, to not be a sick individual.
I do keep these things all in mind, and journal about them, my feelings, etc. but when I fail to stop my engaging of disordered behaviors, I feel tenfold worse, as if I've let down myself, my girlfriend, my family, and even my workplace and ability to thrive in society.
From my experience, i don't think "external" factors helped as much "internal". For example, I kept using my child as motivation - and maybe it worked temporarily, but not ultimately. And if I couldn't get rid of my ed by thinking of my precious child, I don't know what could have worked! Like you, I also tried to use finances as a motivator as well, but that certainly didn't work either.
While external factors may assist in your recovery, my belief is that finding motivation internally is very important. This is very subjective and different for everyone. Part of it has to do with healing your wounds and dealing with your issues, and also getting to the core of what you want for YOUR life. I also realized that I had wasted so much of my life devoted to this stupid disorder that I just wanted to be normal and live!!
My boyfriend (now husband) was a huge factor in this too, so I guess this would be a "highly involved external". He was very hard on me, like a tough love approach. He started cooking me dinner and just didn't take shit from me. He wasn't mean about it, but just tough and I could feel it was because he cared. Yeah I hated it and I resented him for doing this and I often lied to him about my behaviors, but somehow this approach helped. Maybe you can ask your girlfriend to be that type of support to you?? Just a thought - everyone is different and everyone's motivation is different. What worked for me might not work for you, but I pray that you find it! Best wishes