Eating Disorders Support Group

Eating disorders are marked by an obsessive need to control the intake and/or purging of food. This community is dedicated to those struggling on the road to recovery. Join to discuss your experience with others and find support. Get advice, ask questions, and meet others who are going through similar struggles.

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It hit me

IVowed
IVowed

I am eating certain foods, not because I am enjoying them, but because they are the safe foods to eat. I have lost connection with my stomach. I treat it like a bag in which I throw certain foods to keep me going. Not for enjoyment. I am not allowed to feel good while eating the food if it wasn't safe. I don't enjoy safe food as much as I used to. It is all hitting me that I am losing contact with food. I am not saying I don't get hungry or crave certain foods, it is just that I know that eating whatever I am craving is gonna get me downhill and it won't be a happy day. I try to ignore the intense hatered, voices and emotions that come with eating unsafe foods. But then I can't feel happy eating my safe food. So I just lose connection with everything. 


I want this to end. All of this.

red47640
red47640
Wow... Very major epiphany there! You should be very proud of yourself for having the self-awareness and insight to realize that. Hopefully you have the tools and resources at hand to take action from this point. Rooting for you!!!
laureng546
laureng546
I'm starting to feel the same way about food - I don't eat things that taste good. I eat what it takes to keep me from passing out or completely breaking down. I made a weird horrible mushroom soup last night and was completely aware that it was super low calorie and tasted horrible, but I still only ate that for dinner and very little else the rest of the day?? I don't know how to reconnect with food it's not fun to be this way :(
birdie123
birdie123
It is easy to get into the habit of only eating safe foods. This can be for a variety of different reasons. Could you perhaps try adding one new safe food every few days or once a week and slowly build up your safe foods? Maybe once a week try a 'not quite' safe food or consciously and in a thoughtful way eat a food which like and try to 'enjoy' it. Doing it in a planned way can help to take away some of the fear or guilt.

Sadly with an eating disorder it can take away the feelings of 'hunger' and 'fullness', 'like' and 'dislike' of tastes, etc. So sometimes it helps to have a healthy plan (with the help of a professional) to follow to try and slowly move back to a healthier way of eating. It may take a while before the feelings follow. Good luck!