I was just about to reply to your other post before seeing this. All i can say is, i know exactly where you are, to be that obsessive. Exercising a ridiculous amount everyday and making sure there was just NO way i could see any weight gain the next day. It's hard, and i'm still there i suppose, just not as bad as it was a couple years ago..
Its like an unholy sin if you exercise less than the day before, and between that you're finding new ways to be restricting, looking for new lower calorie foods, cutting calories a little everyday..it's no way to live and it makes ED such a bitch..

Jounaling your thoughts is a good idea, having a goal and letting us know here on DS what that is and stepping toward it with our support helps..I know it's a common suggestion but talking to a professional or a dietician can educate more on food, and that it breaks down into way more than just calories that make you fat. Calories don't work that way, understanding that we can change how we look at them, and know what good they do for our bodies honestly truly helps.
For example, i never normally would've eaten so close to going to sleep (i'm betting so don't either) but today i discovered just protein before bed can help maintain your metabolism rev'd through the night and prevent muscle breakdown, which also keeps your body burning calories through the day...weird right?
So i took a protein shake, took a nap (cz i have a virus atm) and didn't feel even slight;y guilty about it...that's something i would have never have done if i didn't take all of a minute to look it up.
I hope this makes you feel more optimistic anyway :) and i would'nt mind a text support either for when i'm out, but i live in bonnie scotland (no shortbread, haggis, ginger hair or kilts though :P) and don't know if that would work for where you live...well i'm not sure anyway..
Man i've rambled..sorry :) but hope this helps even a tiny bit anyway x

Hah thanks alot and your right most of the time I feel calories=fat and that isnt how they work I have read that protien before bed is good for you I try it and like you said its a struggle to eat so close to bed but it does help. Thanks and if you wanted to try text to see if it would work u can message me if youd,like

Have you seen someone about this? I know you probably don't want to but maybe there is an underlying problem that needs to be resolved before you can be happy and healthy. For me my depression and anxiety was consuming me and I used my eating disorder as a way to cope with it. If you ever want to talk I am certainly here and I wish the best for you!

Hi hun. Sorry your going through this. Im bulimic and have been for nearly 10 years (im 24). It is harrrrrd and although 8 months is long enough, it's still early enough to get help and to stop the behaviour. I hope you can because if this takes hold too strongly it is an uphil battle to get rid of it.

Please go to your GP to get help, and u may wanna try Overeater's anonymous (dont freak, it doesnt mean your fat and your an over eater) they accept anyone and have really helped me. I have been abstinant for 3 days and that may not seem like much but considering I have been binging and purging several times a day everday for the majority of my e/d this is a miricle.

Please try it. It's free and may literally save your life hun

Message me anytime u want, hope I can help.

I understand your pain. I am recovered from bulimia for 25 years. It is possible to get through this phase of your life, but you can't do it yourself. You need professional help and support from others who know what you are going through and can be there for you. There is hope and help and all you have to do is ask for it. I know it is hard, but it is SO worth it. Go easy on yourself today! Keep things simple, and take one small step in a new direction, and before you know it you will be going in a new direction. Take care and love yourself! You are beautiful!