Eating Disorders Support Group

Eating disorders are marked by an obsessive need to control the intake and/or purging of food. This community is dedicated to those struggling on the road to recovery. Join to discuss your experience with others and find support. Get advice, ask questions, and meet others who are going through similar struggles.

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I'm just SICK of it. I'm DONE.

struggle8
struggle8
I hate this. I hate living with anorexia. I'm in recovery but I still feel like shit alll the time. I want to get my period back but at the same time i want to go back to being unhealthily thin. I hate this. I hate it so much and i don't think if i can live with it anymore. I'm beginning to thing that living isn't worth it if it has to be with this disease. I'm fat and ugly and a pig and a waste of space and i'm done. I'm just so done it never goes away. Everyone said it would. Everyone said I would recover but I can't do it I cant and I don't even want to anymore. I don't want to live with this and I don't think I will anymore. I really think I'm done.
EmmaammE
EmmaammE
Its so hard isnt it? but you will make. Ive had time where i just wanted to die but i didnt manage it and have made it to a brighter happier place and once you come to that place it is so good you will be glad you didnt kill yourself. Stay strong and keep fighting your totally worth it x x x
jonroland
jonroland
It's hard to know what to say. I've been where you are (where i think you are at least) where i tried/failed/tried/failed/tried/failed and just nothing. Having to hear what friends think and family think and thinking to myself, " did i need to hear that? did i ask what you think?" and people telling me anyway. I've been at that place where no matter what, it's a long hard and awful day, whther im giving into ED or trying to get out.
What i will say is this. I made my peace with the fact that at the start of recovery (and i mean everytime you start it) it's like you're working for nothing. You're not going to get the results you want for a long time, and you're not going to get the satisfaction of letting your ED take over. I hope you can have the faith in me (and i would understand if you don't, i mean you don;t know me) to believe me when i say that if you have faith in yourself, and in your recovery and you can be consistant and paitent..then the satisfaction of taking control of your ED will be 100 times better than anything it could give you right now. Right now, you have to wake up knowing that today won;t be the day everything's peachy, but you're going to get up and do it right anyway..

I hope this gets through to you, if i can help in any way? Just le tme know. Stay in there x
deleted_user
deleted_user
It is hard to do, but you gotta hang in there. It helps me to look at each day individually; like I just wake up trying to make today a successful day. I dont worry about yesterday or tomorrow. It helps keep me from getting too too overwhelmed. Frusteration and anxiety are part of recovery hun. Just try to make today a good day. Every minute that goes by is an opportunity to make a choice that is good for you mind and body. Namaste