A lot of things can be traced back to my family, but there are other factors as well. A lot of my issues stem from not wanting to be like my mother and wanting to separate from her but being afraid to.

However, a part of it is just also who I am. I'm high-strung, volatile and unstable by nature. That, combined with the family dynamic issues, has led me to where I am now.

A lot of the time in therapy, the discussion will steer to the one place you don't want to go. That means you absolutely MUST talk about it. If there's ever anything that makes you really uncomfortable, it means it's probably something you've been covering up that needs to be addressed. Just be open and honest and do the work that needs to be done and you will do fine.

I am a twin so naturally I compete or compare with my sister, but I think it comes down to our upbringing and those roots stem from our families. All issues stem from there in my opinion whether it involves direct family or not...

One of the things that makes ED so hard to treat is that there are usually a lot of factors that all added together and now any one of them can trigger the feelings. Family is often part of it, but there is always more.

My biggest trigger is that I often feel out of control of my long term success/failure and restricting my eating is my replacement. That has nothing to do with family, but the origin is in part that I want my parents to think I am successful so I have a lot at stake. My brothers are all successful so I have hard standards to live up to. Ironically, my parents already think I am successful, so it's all in my head. But that doesn't make it go away.

Sorry if that's TMI. But I just wanted to illustrate that it's probably a lot of things all meshed together.

For me, it's mostly traced to girls in my school and magazines. Staring at all the beatiful, skinny teenage girls. Wishing I was them. It also traces me back to my mother, who suffered from compulsive over-eating disorder. I know that going back to therapy after years of not going is hard to deal with. I would advise you to expect some uncomforable subjects in future sessions. But, never expect the sorse, it only makes your anxiety higher.

Take care of yourself hun. Hang in there.

I believe mine will be traced back to childhood, if I hadn't blocked it all out.....sort of scares me..

I'm like you, billythekid, I'm a twin and I know the competition your talking about. My twin also suffers from anorexia/bulimia, and is pretty extreme about it.
Afireinside-I identify with what you said, since I can remember my mom has been overweight, and was diagnosed as diabetic a couple of years ago. I always promised myself that I wouldn't get to that point. Though I have a lot of respect and love for my mom.
My dad, growing up, would subtly criticize my sister and me for the amount of food that we were eating, or our weight, though we never were 'large' by any standard.
I had a couple of boyfriends, also, who therapists have told me were abusive, and similarly criticized me for any fluctuations in my weight and appearance.

Sometimes I think if I hadn't grown up around this I might not have the problems that I do now. It's hard to know. I just really want to move on, whatever the cause.

yeah for me it always went back to my mom always telling me i need to lose weight since i was in 4th grade or younger. and it also went back to me feeling like i dont fit in with my family. and having so much trauma at home..i thought if i got skinny all my problems and fear would go away

im a twin too but hes a boy ..but wwere opposite....hes popular at school with family..im not...hes skinny..im not...etc

Of course things can be tracked back to your childhood. however after a point when you are done digging all that up and understanding it all, it will be a decision you make as to how much of that you are going to take into your adult life. I choose to allow my ed to be my coping mechanism. I know why it started and realize that I am no longer in that situation and am safe. Yet when I need a way to cope with anything, my ed gives me the most comfort and feeling of control. So I feel I choose it over drinking, or drugging, or any other addiction. I am 58. I am appalled when I see women in their 70 who have eds so bad that they are literally walking toothpicks. I have been a walking toothpick however for 17 I have not allowed that to happen to me again. Our life is our life. We can not as adults choose to keep dragging the past into our future and blaming everything on our families. At some point it becomes our own responsibility. Knowledge is power and it can change your life. I never allowed m y Therapist to point the finger repeatedly at my family. Once the recognition of the situation was made, I dealt with it. I realize it caused the original reason for my ed however now it is my choice and actions that lead me to it for comfort.