I am so sorry you feel this way. It sounds very lonely to be so empty. I have felt alone in a room full of people and it's a terrible feeling. (((gentle hugs)))

Have you tried different types of therapy? There are many techniques out there such as hypnosis, EMDR, working with your inner children (Internal Family Systems, IFS) and probably even more than these three that I can think of right now. When I mention these techniques I am not thinking of using them simply to relieve you of your ED but to help you find the root cause of why you have used all these harmful coping mechanisms since such a young age. Perhaps there is a trauma in your early childhood you don't remember? I had no memories of my childhood trauma until one day I had a flashback. I had completely blocked it out and hypnosis helped me retrieve the memories. I know others who have used EMDR. Have any of your therapists tried these techniques?

I have done some EMDR. Cognitive behavioral, some inner child stuff. Other miscellaneous stuff. It always feels like one hour a week is never enough time to get far enough you know? I completely trust my team they're really good at what they do. I'm not convinced this won't always be there I just can't imagine it being resolved it is such a part of me.

I agree that an hour is not enough. My therpist books everyone for two hours. And since she understands trauma healing she also leaves at least a half hour open after. I never felt rushed out of her office.

If you can afford it would they be willing to give you a two hour time slot?

I'm sorry you feel this way :( Emptiness can be such an overwhelming sensation and it's hard to sit with it. You are important and I think it is wonderful that you are going to therapy and using support groups like this to heal.

I feel similarly sometimes. Personally I have tried to distract myself with food only to come back to that same not-enough feeling. What has helped me is thinking about food as one stress relief technique (not the best one for me) and exploring others that can give me more lasting peace--yoga, journaling, collaging, etc. Making time for these helps me to appreciate that I am not so empty because I have these moments of peace with myself where I can create.

I hope you find some peace today. Hugs.

I have felt an emptiness for as long as I can remember. I can never really describe it though I know its related to my past and history of traumatic events. No matter how fulfilling my life becomes the emptiness still nags at me. In therapy I try to define it and quantify it but it is elusive, yet always with me. Of course I have used food and people and drugs in the past to try to fill the emptiness but these things don't work. I know the answer to the emptiness has to come from within me but I have yet to figure out how or what I need to do. It's beyond frustrating and I can really identify with your post.

I'm so glad you posted this because I didn't know other people struggled with feelings of emptiness. Thank you.

Oh thank you so much Sonny. Ive felt so discouraged that after so much hard work this aloneness doesn't resolve, and wondering what I am doing wrong to still feel this pain. Thanks for validating that you feel this as well and also aren't yet able to figure out how to get it resolved.

Thank you to the others who have also responded. I need to see if there is an option to do longer appointments with my counselor but cost is definitely a factor. Lucky, your comment "I have felt alone in a room full of people" was eerie in that I have made that literal statement for years, and hearing it from someone else was something I haven't had happen before!
Happy Friday to all. We survived Thanksgiving :)

HUGE hugs, LP.
I totally get what you're saying. You aren't alone, that's for sure.

WOOT to surviving Thanksgiving. Now it's on to Christmas:)))

Have you ever heard of Reiki? It's an energy healing that comes from the Divine. It is universal love. Reiki is a hands on healing that is done by someone who has been attuned to be a Reiki Practitioner. When we experience trauma (or sometimes just life itself) we take it in on all levels including a cellular level. Reiki can remove the trauma from our bodies and then replace it with love. It fills the void. I took the classes and became a level 2 Reiki Practitioner so I could do Reiki on myself and it has helped a lot in my healing.

Another way I filled that emptiness was to work with my inner children. It was very rewarding because while working with my inner children I learned to love them, comfort them, have compassion for them and heal them. Which in turn means I learned to love, comfort and have compassion for myself. It was in working with my inner children that I found where the emptiness was coming from and I was able to heal that emptiness by filling it up with my own love for myself. The emptiness for me was also deep hurt. A hurt that I healed through many hours of working with my inner children hearing their stories about why they were so hurt and then processing the hurt through crying oceans of tears.

These were two ways I found useful in helping me heal and fill the emptiness. If these don't work for you I do hope you will find your way soon.