Divorce after Twenty years together Community Group
I want to start something for those of us that were married for a long long time. I think that we face a little different issues than those who were dating for a few years or even married for shorter period of time. Being married for so long we have older children some have grandkids dealing with teenagers and their reaction to the divorice empty nesters dating after 40...
When life throws you Lemons...... Add 1 pitcher of water, 4 cups of ice, 5 shots of Rasberry Smirnoff, and top with a few close friends........ Now this is just what I do and some how no matter how crappy I feel it seems to help. Isn't it just amazing how STRONG our good Lord made us Women!!!! We are designed to be fighters from birth. We are designed to with stand all kinds of pain from giving birth, to mending a broken heart and over coming any obstacle in our lives. DO YOU KNOW HOW STRONG YOU ARE??? Are you giving your self credit for just waking up and facing your day. Even if it's with an ache in your heart and soul, even if your smile is forced on your face. Your still doing it. How many of us when we are so caught up in our own little world of Divorce mess have taken the time to look around and see if there are people around us hurting and suffering even more than us.
I never want to be so caught up in me that I can't see if someone else is hurting. I learned this lesson today and I want to share it with all of you. Maybe it will light a spark in you to and start turning your sadness into something hopeful for someone else. Most of you know i'm a Kindergarten Teacher and I was taught a big lesson today not by a co- worker or another adult parent but, by a precious 5 yr old child. This little boy taught me that courage and strength and the ability to overcome your circumstances doesn't matter how old you are, how big you are,or how much money you have. It's only a matter of HEART AND CHARACTER. I am a little ashamed to admit this but I have been moaning and groaning for the past week about spousal support, child support and why my stbx is making this so hard for us. I need that money maybe I need to get some tires for my car, maybe I want to start n Easter basket for my son, maybe I don't want to have late fees on my storage unit, ect.... Important stuff right??????
Until I asked my student why are you so late today? Why do you look so tired? What he said next I will never forget EVER!!! Ms. T i'm so sorry i'm late but my mom and I had to leave our house last night and walk to a homeless shelter, But when we got there it was full so we rode the bus for awhile and ended up at a church. Have you had anything to eat honey? I asked with tears pouring down my face. No i'm hungry Ms T can I have a bowl of cereal please. I went and got him some warm food let him eat and put him to sleep in the reading corner. While he slept I saw mom out in the office talking to the principle I joined and the story of what this woman and her little boy had been through shook me to my core. Immediatly I no longer cared about my dumb battle about spousal support and bills, tires, ect....... This little boy had more courage and strength in his little body than I did in mine. I almost immediatly gathered up the other teachers made some phone calls found them shelter and food for awhile. I am even going to watch him afterschool so mom can go look for a job.
When my stbx called me later in the day to start some kind of crap with me about this or that. I actually LAUGHED AT HIM and said " I just don't care right now, I don't care anymore.. There are alot more important things for me to deal with right now and none of them concern YOU!!!!!!! EVERYTHING IS NOT ABOUT YOU!!!!!!
The Judge will deal with him on the 3rd and it will be what it will be I can't control that. But what I can control is helping this little family get a freash start. I had aot of people in my corner this past year to help me and my kids. Now it's time or me to GIVE IT BACK. It's time for me to return all the love and support I got when my world fell apart over a year ago. And maybe just maybe this little boy will remember and he will grow up and be a giver not a TAKER!!!!!!
Do something for someone else who needs it. It could just be exactly what you need. Maybe someone around you is hurting also and you just haven't noticed. Give yourself the gift of not focusing on all your problems even if it's just for one day. You never know you could get awhole new look on life......
Big Disney Hugs.....
T
I never want to be so caught up in me that I can't see if someone else is hurting. I learned this lesson today and I want to share it with all of you. Maybe it will light a spark in you to and start turning your sadness into something hopeful for someone else. Most of you know i'm a Kindergarten Teacher and I was taught a big lesson today not by a co- worker or another adult parent but, by a precious 5 yr old child. This little boy taught me that courage and strength and the ability to overcome your circumstances doesn't matter how old you are, how big you are,or how much money you have. It's only a matter of HEART AND CHARACTER. I am a little ashamed to admit this but I have been moaning and groaning for the past week about spousal support, child support and why my stbx is making this so hard for us. I need that money maybe I need to get some tires for my car, maybe I want to start n Easter basket for my son, maybe I don't want to have late fees on my storage unit, ect.... Important stuff right??????
Until I asked my student why are you so late today? Why do you look so tired? What he said next I will never forget EVER!!! Ms. T i'm so sorry i'm late but my mom and I had to leave our house last night and walk to a homeless shelter, But when we got there it was full so we rode the bus for awhile and ended up at a church. Have you had anything to eat honey? I asked with tears pouring down my face. No i'm hungry Ms T can I have a bowl of cereal please. I went and got him some warm food let him eat and put him to sleep in the reading corner. While he slept I saw mom out in the office talking to the principle I joined and the story of what this woman and her little boy had been through shook me to my core. Immediatly I no longer cared about my dumb battle about spousal support and bills, tires, ect....... This little boy had more courage and strength in his little body than I did in mine. I almost immediatly gathered up the other teachers made some phone calls found them shelter and food for awhile. I am even going to watch him afterschool so mom can go look for a job.
When my stbx called me later in the day to start some kind of crap with me about this or that. I actually LAUGHED AT HIM and said " I just don't care right now, I don't care anymore.. There are alot more important things for me to deal with right now and none of them concern YOU!!!!!!! EVERYTHING IS NOT ABOUT YOU!!!!!!
The Judge will deal with him on the 3rd and it will be what it will be I can't control that. But what I can control is helping this little family get a freash start. I had aot of people in my corner this past year to help me and my kids. Now it's time or me to GIVE IT BACK. It's time for me to return all the love and support I got when my world fell apart over a year ago. And maybe just maybe this little boy will remember and he will grow up and be a giver not a TAKER!!!!!!
Do something for someone else who needs it. It could just be exactly what you need. Maybe someone around you is hurting also and you just haven't noticed. Give yourself the gift of not focusing on all your problems even if it's just for one day. You never know you could get awhole new look on life......
Big Disney Hugs.....
T
Blessings and Hugs,
T.
You're so right. It's easy to become so immersed in our own worries that we forget that there are others out there in desperate straits. I couldn't count the number of times I've been feeling sorry for myself when I've found out about others in much worse places. It brings me back to earth with a bang.
love and hugs
kamary
I saw a large pile of garbage over by a communal fence in my neighbourhood - I think I'll go over and clean it up. Thanks for the inspiration Disney - doing for others is so good for the spirit!
Hugs!
...and when life throws you lemons, chuck them back and demand chocolate.
L~
(can you keep us posted on your little friend? Will send up some prayers for them!)