Divorce after Twenty years together Community Group
I want to start something for those of us that were married for a long long time. I think that we face a little different issues than those who were dating for a few years or even married for shorter period of time. Being married for so long we have older children some have grandkids dealing with teenagers and their reaction to the divorice empty nesters dating after 40...
Well my visit to Idaho is over and my emotions are all over the place. First I am happy to be going home as I have discovered that this is not home. I'm looking forward to the new semester and I love my new friends and Church family. They continue to grow on me.
But the visit here has made me more aware of what my youngest son is putting up with (2 young children under foot all of the time and they are not well-behaved). A Dad that thinks if he yells loud enough, he's a good parent. A dad that has so much hatred for me now that the OW is back in his life. The good news is that my son stayed with me the whole holidays, got caught up on his senior project and made a 30 on his ACT. It's only 4 months and I think he will be fine. I have 2 people who have volunteered to take him in if things get bad with his Dad.
Then my oldest and DIL got into a big fight with him and have stayed with her family which I kinda figured would happen.
I am still having such a time with my ex and this tax situation. He won't pay his share and the attorneys keep telling me I could get stuck paying it all because he isn't paying. There were several illegal things that happened in this whole situation that could allow me to go after him criminally (forged signatures, OW pretending to be me on the phone, etc.) but I'm trying not to go that route. I'm even willing to pay half of the thing but I will not get stuck with the whole thing. I need to get my youngest graduated and then it won't matter as much. I am so done with this man.
Anyway please pray for my sons, me and a resolution to the whole nightmare that was my 20 year marriage!
But the visit here has made me more aware of what my youngest son is putting up with (2 young children under foot all of the time and they are not well-behaved). A Dad that thinks if he yells loud enough, he's a good parent. A dad that has so much hatred for me now that the OW is back in his life. The good news is that my son stayed with me the whole holidays, got caught up on his senior project and made a 30 on his ACT. It's only 4 months and I think he will be fine. I have 2 people who have volunteered to take him in if things get bad with his Dad.
Then my oldest and DIL got into a big fight with him and have stayed with her family which I kinda figured would happen.
I am still having such a time with my ex and this tax situation. He won't pay his share and the attorneys keep telling me I could get stuck paying it all because he isn't paying. There were several illegal things that happened in this whole situation that could allow me to go after him criminally (forged signatures, OW pretending to be me on the phone, etc.) but I'm trying not to go that route. I'm even willing to pay half of the thing but I will not get stuck with the whole thing. I need to get my youngest graduated and then it won't matter as much. I am so done with this man.
Anyway please pray for my sons, me and a resolution to the whole nightmare that was my 20 year marriage!
I don't really understand why you have the gloves off. This money that you don't owe is part of your new life, your future and it seems, the future of your children.
If I had evidence of fraud, I would pursue it.
BUT prayers coming your way hon. For you and your sons and your grandchildren.
Your son sounds like he'll be ok, but I bet he was sure glad to spend time with you. Four months, he has something to keep his eye on, you both only have to make it four more months. Stay strong. Hopefully the last of his senior year will keep him busy.
If only these ex's could see and understand what devestation they have caused their children and everyone involved.
My prayer has been said for you already, and many more will be added till you can all find peace, and be away from your ex.
Please feel the (((Hugs))), prayers, comforting thoughts, prayers, love and friendship that I'm sending you.
Sounds like your kids are gradually working out who is the one giving them grief in this.
So your son has only 4 months to ACT. Being from Australia, I'm not sure what that is? What will he do then? I hope he's not staying with his dad. So glad you have other places for him to go if he has to. Why can't he be with you?
I can understand you not wanting to go the legal route with your ex but please consider it carefully if it's going to affect you and your situation in the long run.
Prayers are done. More on a regular basis on the way.
love and hugs
kamary
I believe I can get the ex to pay it by making him think I will go after him. You know it would be hard to prove he did all the things he's done. It really is a crap shoot and even if I could prove it all, to what end would it be? My poor son would be humiliated. It really isn't if this money will break me and I think I can get him to pay but I want it done!
Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers!
Although you could fight your ex legally, sometimes it's better to just walk away. He may think he wins, but we all know that in the end he will lose when he loses his children and their respect.
Hugs! So glad my ex stays out of my life.
Blessings to you both
Your son will be fine. Good that you are keeping tabs on that situation and that there is a backup plan for him if things with his father get too out of line.
Hang in there, girlfriend! You are holding your own!
Psalm 63:8 I cling to you; your right hand upholds me
When you have time read all of 63. It was written by David when he was in the desert of Judah
Anyway...my point is...pick your battles...sometimes its just not worth the trouble to stand ground. Things always have a way of working themselves out. When you are true to yourself and act out of honesty and love...good things come your way. He was deceptive and dishonest...Karma will pick the time and place...you can count on that and it will more than likely be a good one. Big Hugs...Kathy
Congrats for such a great ACT score. That is such great news that you can help him with his college costs that way.
Take Care.
I'm glad you don't have too much longer until your son is out of there, but the tax situation is a worry. I hope you get that settled in your favor and soon!
You're a strong woman--he's a JERK!!!!!!
(((hugs)))