Dialysis Support Group
Dialysis is a type of renal replacement therapy which is used to provide an artificial replacement for lost kidney function due to renal failure. It is a life support treatment and does not treat any kidney diseases. Dialysis may be used for very sick patients who have suddenly lost their kidney function or for quite stable patients who have permanently lost their kidney...
I live alone I am doing hemo at home and I work from home. I am now being told I am not producing enough urine and I may have to start doing day time exchanged. I am filled with anxiety and very depressed. I have a hard time get to sleep and then it's even harder getting up. Trying to figure how I can have a life while working and either going in center or doing exchanges during the day. I am feeling overwhelmed and wondering why I keep going. I have no family near me and just a couple of friends, I am at my wit's end. I just want to go to sleep and never wake up. I hate my life which is a living nightmare.
Is kidney disease. Are you doing peritoneal dialysis? I know you said you aren't doing hemo. Would they be switching you from peritoneal to hemo?
I don't know if this helps, but is there a social worker you can talk to at your clinic? Just someone you can explain your situation to? Someone who might have resources you can utilize? I know when I was on dialysis my social worker helped tremendously.
I don't want to pry, but can I ask if you are on the transplant list? Being on the list gave me some hope. I waited 5 yrs for a kidney and struggled greatly during that time, but I am so glad I chose to live. My life with a transplant is better that I ever could've imagined.
I know you say you have no great impact, but you matter. As a human being, on this earth YOU MATTER. You are important and have worth and value.
Kidney disease nearly drove me to suicide, and I can sympathize with how you are feeling. I felt worthless, useless, like a waste of space that no one would miss if they were gone.
I don't know if this helps, but people would miss you. You are worthy. You are important. Please don't give up on yourself. If you need to talk or vent, please PM me or reply to this post. I was in the depth of despair about my kidney disease, and often questioned if all the exhaustion, pain, depression and grief were worth it. I wish I had more to say, more words of comfort to offer. But I just want you to know you matter, and you are worth it.
Hang in there. And please let me know if I can do anything to help.