My wife was generally happy, stabile, and sensible for probably 25 years or more more while we're married or before. We had thought about moving and then we decided to first sell, then buy. She became a little picky and passed on a couple of nice houses to buy. We were in temporary quarters,that she picked but she grew to hate it and said she should never have moved. Then she lamented not buying two of the houses and said she hated herself and her status, and sits and cries many days.
Family members have tried to talk to her, she has seen a couple of doctors, but shies away from counselors. She just says all the time, I f...ked my life up, I hate myself, then may apologize to me. It's almost impossible to get her to focus on next steps, buying another house, renting, etc, because she constantly goes back to past decisions which accomplishes nothing. I thought this was a female or gender issue but women friends or relatives are immensely frustrated too about her unwillingness or inability to look to the future and instead she just says I ruined our life.
Not to say the situation is not objectively serious, but we could try to get another house, perhaps pay more money, maybe see if the market changes, but no, we just get self-pity and depression. Sometimes an anti-depressant will help a little, she'll seem to pep up around family or a friend she'll say, but then she'll tell me she's faking and is miserable and wants her old life back.
I have a task from my therapist...Im supposed to make a conscious effort to talk to someone in my zumba class.... I have been in this class for 5 years now. I talk to no one. I think it's too late. People think I'm unfriendly or weird. I have no idea how to even approach people and I know I put off an approachable vibe. Needless to say, after class today I made a beeline to my car....maybe next...
I'm living in a personal care home--this particular one since March of this year, when the one I'd been living in the previous 3 years closed. I hate this place. The food is terrible. I don't know anybody, I have no friends here. My husband passed away in June 2017. We had good times and bad times. At least then I had a life. I had a nice apartment full of stuff and a car. When he died I lost all...