Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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What to do

soulinabag
soulinabag

things have been going well , until today. My boyfriend got slammed with child support papers for a kid he’s never met nor has signed the birth certificate for. She’s about two years old and he didn’t believe she was his. Now he has to go to court to do a paternity test. I know he doesn’t think she’s his, but I know she is. She looks just like him. I know he’s going to have to pay child support, and if she’s his rightfully so, but the thing is, I just found out I’m pregnant a few weeks ago. So I’ve been desperately saving money to try to prepare,  and it’s been stressful just doing that. Now this happens and I know it’s going to be more money. I haven’t been in a situation like this, nor do I know much about how issues with child support work. Right now my main priority is my unborn child. It’s depressing me, because I feel like I’m not going to be able to do this with other bills every month as well. I make more money than my boyfriend now, so he probably couldn’t afford it if it happens without my help as well. I guess I just feel kind of stuck at the moment. 

shadowlady
shadowlady
It does no good to consider the " what gifs" or the problems of tomorrow. Concentrate on today! Prayers and blessings.
Ghostwolf04
Ghostwolf04
You don't have to keep the baby....just saying. Sorry if I sound like an asshole but I really don't understand why you are having a child with someone you aren't married to, and it sounds unplanned. Birth control and condoms are inexpensive and not hard to obtain or use.
If you really want to have this kid then you are just going to have to suck it up and deal with it like an adult. You may have to get 2 jobs and never sleep, but that's what happens when you have a kid. Like the previous post said, no point in thinking what if. Just gotta deal with what is happening. Maybe tell your bf it's game over and he needs to step up to support you and 2 children since he had the bright idea of not using protection.
Rhenry2222
Rhenry2222
I think just like when ever you buy a big ticket item you wonder if you will be able to afford it, but it gets easier afterwards & you realize you worried for nothing. Raising 2 kids, buying a house, I worried every time. Some how it all works out, Maybe with some help from family members.
OLDBIKER
OLDBIKER
I don't know what state you live in but, some states, the child support is based on the father's income. It may not be as bad as you think. Just take it a step at a time. It will all work out.
sonnycamehome
sonnycamehome
You'll manage. We always seem to find a way to make room for and accommodate life's expenses. I suspect you'll experience much joy in the process. Hang in there :)
serenityspeaks
serenityspeaks
Child support is always on income and his income. If it is his kid then no matter what he will need to pay. Outside of that just focus on yourself and taking care of th baby and saving what you can. Raising kids is expensive for sure. I agree things often will work out, you figure it out. As a mom of 3 I can relate to the worry but again it's never as bad as what it seemed and I figured it out. Take care.
soulinabag
soulinabag
Thank you all❤️ Your encouraging words really helped a lot
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