It's been over a year since my girlfriend of 4 months and I had broke up. I wasent with her a long time but it was really special to me for alot of reasons. I don't see any happiness in anything around me. My family keeps saying I am a problem and that I need to stop being a bad person. They don't really get what's going on I guess. They just say I'm stupid for holding on to things.  I've tried to stop but I just cant. Any time I think about how my life could be in the future, everything I wish I had with her keep coming back to me and I can't stand it. I really miss her and I don't know what to do anymore. I thought about ending my life alot of times over the last year and it's gotten to a point where I think about it every day. I can't sleep at night because it hurts so much. I've prayed every night for the past year and it hasent helped me at all. I don't really believe it will anymore. It's like every day things get worse, and I dread every morning because I know by now that things won't just get better. I really don't know what to do with this anymore, it really feels like there is nothing left.