Hi there,

I have felt that way about my family before. And when I did, it almost always took me from a bad day to a crisis day.

However, when I feel better I realize how hard it is for them to understand or accept that someone they love is in this situation and is chronic and no matter what they try to do to help, it doesn't work. It wears on them too. At some point, it is not that they don't care; it's just that they have to cope with it too and sometimes they do that by avoiding it. Or they simply don't know what to do so they don't do anything and we interpret that as them not caring.

I'm not saying this is your situation with your family. I don't know exactly what is going on in your case. I'm just saying depression makes us more sensitive to rejection and we sometimes interpret rejection from those we care for because they don't react as we expect them to. They might get frustrated with us and start blaming us or criticizing us or putting pressure on us and make us feel worse. But often it is because they do care and are angry with themselves and with life (and with us) because we're not better.

It is just hard on everyone when someone they care for is depressed.

My advice is to try to find someone that you feel understands you and rely on that person for support when none of your loved ones is available. Have you considered therapy or is that accessible to you at all?

Take care,

My family absloutely STINKS at supporting me so I have pretty much broken off contact with them. If people are toxic to you you have two choices; confront them or protect yourself by distancing yourself from them. I know how much this can hurt. Take care.

My family siblings and parents donot understand and think I can snap out of it. It does make a bad day worse. I think people who don't suffer from this can't begin to understand how painful it is and how eveyday is a fight. I hope you find support here and know your not alone. hugs to you

Hi, I don't think your family does not care. I can't be sure, but it sure feels that way when you are suffering. My family was scared and confused. They just could not understand why I was in the hospital and when I just could not get up or out, I got hassled. They don't understand that you just can't cope. Now they have a grasp of my problems, but they don't understand what they have never experienced. I found there are two kinds of people. There are those who want to live and those who don't. Those who don't, want relief from what seems like constant pain. I don't know that you want some ideas to help, but I can suggest a few. Set just a couple goals, something like eating ice cream, or taking a short walk. Try to get out maybe once a day. Sometimes I can't even do that. Then let yourself feel good about your accomplishments. Just 10 minutes on my elliptical helps. Sometimes I can't do hat either. Be kind to yourself. Set aside the negative thoughts that go thru your head.
Hopefully you will have a break and feel better. The ups and downs. come and go.

I have been blessed with a very supportive and understanding mother and my dad just doesn't understand why I can't go out walking and hiking with him anymore, why I can't be like I used to be because he has never dealt with any sort of depression of chronic illness and cannot understand. I know it can be so hard to deal with your own problems when your family can't deal with them and it just makes things so much worse. They just don't understand what you are going through and deserve some slack (not an infinite supply but some) because while you know what you are going through and still have a hard time dealing with it and accepting it they don't and can't know completely what it is you are going through and so they definitely don't know how to accept it or understand it or deal with it. I am no saying that they are guiltless in the least just that they don't realize how much worse they can make things by not trying to be open and kind and understanding, your safe place to fall when the rest of the world has gone to crap.