>>Please tell me km not alone

DEFINITELY not alone.

While I have sincere sympathy for you ... in this very difficult position, your best resource is the Medical Profession. Your disabilities are complex and 'disabling', but they are treatable.

I suspect your practical problem is getting EFFECTIVE medical care. I am not a doctor and though medication is the primary course, I think you need more than that ... I think you need better 'attention' from the profession. I think the profession is tossing you some medications ... for whatever the medication can do for you. The profession needs to take this more seriously.

Friends and family (and possibly yourself) need to study and be aware of your conditions and learn how to sympathize and SUPPORT you.

I wish I could help you more, but this is the best advice I can give.

>>I feel like a rubbish mum

I seriously doubt that ... more likely a Mum with untreated disabilities. This is what I am talking about ... where medication is available ... there is no SUPPORT. You need help from the medication AND a support system.

Thank you.. I have seen numerous councilors and mental health proffesinals none of which I have found much help.. I have to refer myself for counseling.. And I have been given some websites to help manage the way I think.. That's the best I haveout of my doctor :( I feel like I hit my head against a brick wall talking to them I think I have least faith

Professionals even x

I am sure you are trying with all your might. Problem is .. it's not working.

I don't know what the solution is ... but I am assuming it lies with the medical profession .... or PERHAPS Internet research.

I have done both.. Guess I'm just looking for people in the same boat that can offer a shoulder or listen :) and for me to know I'm not alone is a big thing x

"I prefer to have time alone" Me too. Don't have anymore children, get on some sort of birth control, now that is likely going to mess with your feelings too as most are hormonal. It can also lower your sex drive.

I don't want to get up out of bed either with my issues, but I am the only one and paying the bills and with a kid getting ready to go off to college.

I hope you can get someone to help you with the children so you can have some alone time. I can't imagine trying to care for 3 little ones and have the sort of issues you describe.

A COUCELOR ONCE TOLD ME "NORMAL" IS THE SETTING ON A WASHER............................
I WOULD LOVE 2 FEEL NORMAL LIKE OTHER PEOPLE BUT I DONT REALLY KNOW HOW NORMAL THEY R.
I WOULD LIKE 2 FUNCTION NORMALLY, LIKE DRIVE AND GET UP EARLY AND STAY UP LATE AND BE ABLE 2 HOLD A JOB.
MY INOPERABLE BRAIN TUMOR WONT LET ME.
I M OM SEIZURE MEDS WHICH MAKES ME FEEL LIKE I M MOVING THRU MUD ALL THE TIME..........................
GBU
D
;-O

I'm not planning more children I'm on birth control.. Sometimes it just helps to vent to people who understand x

You are not alone at all. Most people have to go through the trial and error of medications. I think the anxiety site and the ocd site would be beneficial for you as well as the depression board. I'm really sorry that your husband acts as if he doesn't care. I hope that's not true and it just feels that way because you are so down. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be alone, just make sure to give your children good memories with the time you do spend together. Quality is far more important than quantity. Welcome to the DS family. Hugs Gramybear

you are not alone and this is the lace to vent ...it is extreamly for our families and even our husbands to understand what is going on inside of us ....because they have never experanced it they have nothing to co pair it to ..they just can't imagian what it is we go through ......I had to take my h to my phicitrist a number of times so he could here from him what he was doing that wasent heing and to be educated ...on my condition that realy helped ..you might try that ....I know how dificult it is to raise children when you are depresed .....I have been dresed all my life .....and some days just puting on that smiling face was very hard ...but my children ....were my strength ...and today I have beautifull grand children ..and finaly want to be here ..I never saw that one comming ..so keep fighting ....it only took me 50 years to want to be here .....you never know what is comming ..and always look for the good things ..and think on them ..bring positive energy into you ......it can only help ...take care ...God bless

Thank you both very much it means the world right now to know that I'm not alone and that I'm not completely weird for the way I feel.. My life is pretty manic.. And when I sit alone I just feel this overwhelming peace.. Silly hey.. I'm hoping this medication may help.. I know that there is no quick fix.. But boy I wish there was.. My anxiety got so bad my husband had to leave his job to care for me.. I couldn't take our children to nursery or even go to a doctors appointment.. I think it's hard for him.. Especially how moody and up and down I am all the time. Think it takes its toll on our relationship x