Don't take this the wrong way, or take it anyway you like, I really just didn't want to break DS's "be nice" rule, but I progress...

If you really had to do things, you'd be doing them. That's not typical rhetoric that probably most people are telling you, it's me saying, if you're sleeping all the time then you must need to sleep! It's really that simple.

From your post I got this, people are telling you, that you're no good, not necessarily in those exact words, and you're believing it. It is also that simple.

A loved one almost got me killed one when they insisted I could drive and I really couldn't from being so depressed. Normal people equate depression with a few sad hours here or there, so it's easy to snap out of that, real depression is totally different and something like 1 out of 10 people ever REALLY experience it.

It's important to not get angry, it's hard, but it's key to getting through a deep depression. There will be time for venting and anger later, but it might give you more compassion for others.

During my depression I realized that ignorance dominates, especially from loved ones when it comes to illnesses of the mind like depression. It's nothing against the loved ones, I couldn't tell you how a broken leg feels because I've never had one, but I could say walk it off and be wrong, does that make sense?

People's idea of production is way different from God's idea of production, I admit I assume, and they are often wrong. Your mother is just going to have to deal with the fact that she has a sick child and you don't need her aggrivation towards you.

Society hates failures, God loves them, it is also that simple. Society and people are not God, it's as cut and dry as that.

I'll pray for you.

Thank you, happinesssought...

it's kinda funny that your post is probably the most honest I have ever gotten when I climb up on my depression soapbox ...I think that's why it makes actually makes sense...there is just one little problem...

I'm the one telling myself...that I am no good, that I am a failure...

SO...is that just the depression or what? ...I don't talk about this stuff to anyone...I am a very introverted and PRIVATE person...

so this 'depression' label is really a pain for me...although all the damn symptoms are there...I just don't know what to do with these feelings that I don't have...I am so confused!!!!

So to sum it up... You have a fear of failure that makes you feel paralyzed to do anything and also makes you beat up on yourself. I get that because I do it too. I came to discover that I'm a perfectionist and my desire to do things "the right way" made it so that I never did anything at all. And when I attempted to, and it wasn't perfect, then I mentally flogged myself so that I didn't even try anymore for awhile.

I am slowly realizing these things and making an effort to change. NOTHING will ever be perfect. I can do just a little bit and it will be ok. I am not superwoman, and no one expects me to be, and if they do... Well I don't care. Once I leave the expectation of perfection, I feel better about the small things I do, and that gives me momentum to do more.

So figure out what small thing you want to accomplish - SMALL thing - and focus on that. After you shift your mind-set, it does get easier.