I\'ve been a freaking train wreck for the last like 6+ months. Some days I am okay. But it never lasts long. Generally, I\'ve been really low, really crabby, really depressed over the last half year or so. It all started with the break up at the end of august. I\'m over that now, but it\'s like ever since that happened it\'s been nothing but bad shit piling up and up and up and up. It\'s not big things either. It\'s little things. It\'s everything. It\'s feeling trapped and alone and hopeless. It\'s gotten to the point where I can\'t even remember what it\'s like to be truly happy. Sometimes I wonder if I ever was. I dunno. I just keep falling apart more and more every day. I don\'t know how much more I can deal with or how much longer I can put up with this. And I don\'t know what I can do about it. Nothing seems to help. I can hang out with people and be pseudo-happy, and sometimes I feel like I\'m happy... but it\'s not real. There\'s still this horrible pain hiding in the shadows of my mind no matter how I feel momentarily. It just won\'t go away and I am at my wits end. I\'ve been depressed so many times before and I always pull through. But I\'ve never been so depressed for so long. I don\'t know what to do... other than keep coming on DS to get a little comfort and feel a little less alone and wait for it to pass... but I\'m tired of waiting.. I\'ve been waiting for months and months and it just doesn\'t seem like it will ever go away this time...