Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I can't stop thinking my father's new family after my parents's divorce. Both him and my mom was cheating before that.
I hate my dad. I never liked him. He wasn't a good father or a good husband. His family used to hate me when I was born because I'm a girl(but when I got something to be proud of, they just 'loved' me again. It stinks.)
So I always have this hatred for him. Why can he find someone again? Why couldn't he be a good dad or a good husband? Why was my childhood ruined by this person? It's just unfair.
Sometimes I wish I could change everything then now I will have a happy family.
I have never done something wrong or upset him. Even I didn't like him, I would just pretend that I do. I worked hard and became better.
But I just can't stop feeling that I don't deserve love after all this. Then my depression got back, got worse.
All I wanted was a normal family. No matter how hard I worked on this, relationships just can't be mended again.
Now I'm doubting whether I have the ability to love or to be loved. I'm afraid of close relationships now but I'm still wanting my family back.
However when I saw my father and his new wife, I drown myself back in sorrow and anger.
I'm broken as hell but no one seems to have the willingness to admit their faults. After all, I'm still a damn kid.
I am going to tell you somthing you might not understand ......but it works ......it is forgiveness ...not for them ...because they don't deserve it ..but to forgive them for your self ..to free your self from ..them having any hold over you .....from you feeling any pain over them ....it would take ....councling ....it would take work ....but when you can get there you will be able to put it behind you ...you won't forget .....but the pain will leave .....you never have to see them again ...but if you chouise to you will understand ..not to expect any thing else from them ...and you won't want to spend your time with them any more .....if they can treat you good all the time they don't deserve to be a part of the times when you have somthing to celeberate .........
I can't answer your questions .....as to why ........things happen ......but you are right it was unfair ...........
you ...so ....deserve ...love .....as I read this .....I see a person who is very capable of .loving ....they couldent take that from your heart ....you need to work through some things ...and depreshion makes us feel like we are in loved and we can't love ..depreshion is all about negative emotions ....negative feelings ..nagatitive thinking ....so you need to get treated for the depreshion ...if it is affecting your life ....and it sounds like it is .....................
take very good care of your self .....I will keep you in my prayers .....God bless
I do understand what you are saying but .
family .......are ............people who love you and are good and loving toward you ....and who you love .......that's family ...that's normal .....