I know it's hard to feel that much hurt and to feel like you have nobody to turn to. It takes courage to tell people you're depressed and to reach out. There are people here who will lend an ear and offer encouragement, you aren't alone. I know it's not easy feeling so down, but don't give up, keep fighting. I'm here if you need someone to talk to.

I agree, it's really hard to open up. You don't want to be judged, to hurt people and it takes effort to reach out.
Please tell us all how you feel here. Sometimes writing down what your feeling can help and for me, just hearing another voice on the phone can help. In the crisis area of DS there are lots of phone lines, where people are just waiting and wanting to listen and help

Sometimes what you feel inside needs to get out in order to make room for feeling better. triple hugs of support~

Please consider contacting a helpline (you can find a list by clicking the "Crisis" button on the menu at the top of the page and scrolling down to the "Suicide Prevention / Depression" category. (If you live in the U.S., I personally recommend the 741741 textline, where you can text with a crisis counselor who can be supportive).
I too have been to those dark places. I struggle with suicide/self harm thoughts every now and again. I encourage you to consider seeing a pschologist/psychiatrist to maybe try meds or therapeutic techniques. Personally, of those two meds have been most helpful. Honestly the thing that really saved me from suicide when I was hopeless was my relationship with Jesus. It also helps to have friends and family members that you can share with (this really does help and if there is no one to listen, I would pray or journal. For me I prayed for someone to talk to and then they showed up in my life, but for some people it's better to use a method of venting that doesn't require reaching out to a loved one. For me journalling just gets extremely negative and makes me feel worse so I wouldn't do it if you experiment and this is what happens. I am not one of those people who feels better doing something independently than reaching out for help but you may be). Distraction can be a useful tool, particularly funny videos seem to be effective for a lot of people.
Best wishes. Please carry on!! We on DS care and send our love!! You MATTER! <3

Dearest Christiann,
I, too, struggle with depression (largely due to living in chronic pain) and I agree with you that it is hard to find someone to listen. Last night, I was driving to do errands and I was crying. Knowing that I needed to get off the road lest I cause an accident, I found myself in a church parking lot. I was born into the Catholic religion but I am not a practicing Catholic. I went inside and sat down. the tears that flowed, OMG! Some woman came in and asked if she could sit with me. Saying yes, she took my hand and closed her eyes in prayer. We sat for almost a 1/2 hour as my back could not tolerate any more. When I got up to leave, she kissed me on the check and said, 'Whatever it is that you are struggling with, HE hears you' That brought me some comfort. Sensing my pain, she only offered to sit and pray for me. I am not one to push religion on anyone but I will assure you, He hears you. I had the best night's sleep in months. You are doing the right things, reaching out. Keep doing that! You are in my prayers. xoLyn