Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
Hi all. I've been dealing with flashbacks, sometimes during daytime. My doc has increased meds, but it's really whistling in the dark. Full realization of what happened has not "hit" me, after 4 months, I'm terrified of that. Right now I'm feeling desperate for relief . The depression and anxiety and sense of futility, are far stronger than ever . Friggin loneliness and lack of TLC are taking a toll. My heart is skipping beats as I write. I'm in the "bargaining " phase of grief.
I'm so so sorry. A sudden loss like that is horrendous agony.
It took me a year to start to normalize myself.
I hope its not that long for you. All you can do is go through each day trying to make it to the next day.
25 years is a long time and many memories. Its tough to tell someone else how they should handle it. I didn't handle it well myself. I cut everyone out of my life for a full year.
Keep your friends and family close. It does help. But only you know what's best for you emotionally.
Keep posting..... Believe me, others here do know what your going through.
Thanks. I have a couple of things that are helping me. My experience as a paramedic, and hospital work, has made me familiar with death. I've seen things you wouldn't believe. Broken bodies can be regarded as a medical problem.
Also, I have found that the absolutely surreal experience, has placed my mind/emotions in a state of astonishment and humility that also surprises me. I thought I had seen it all. Been there, done that. Nope. It's like Picard has just beemed me down alone on planet Venus. The situation is so far beyond my.coping abilities, it's easier to discard notions of denial. One cannot hold a dying person physically, and maintain denial. I had no way to buy myself some extra time through denial . Denial can be very useful. So my mental/emotional
At this point I am asking the Universe to bring us back together in a healthy context. Next lifetime. I stopped weeping for about a week, but it's back, the pictures are becoming hard to dismiss, hard to stay in the moment
Bless you all on D S
Don't forget, this is temporary, and all the pain we are experiencing will not be wasted. We are in a state of "fierce grace"
I try to match that terrible firey fierce~ness with an ocean of cool water.
I see this as primarily a Spiritual process. I know it will eventually produce a different me. But until that day comes, it's going to be rough going.