bad things keep happening to me. i lose a job, a bf, didnt pass a test, car accident, 2 tickets, lost all my friends, my famiky doesnt like me. im too unbearable. and really alone. i think about either killing myself of checking into a mental hospital or.moving across the workd and disappearing. i dont do drugs. i dont drink..i have a doctorate degree. i dont like to blame.my ex but since he left me i have gotten worse and bad things just keep happening.. i want him to come back and help me but he was verbally and emotionally abusive at times. but i would take all the back just to have some love in my life.. i dont want to live anymore
i just don't see how any of this can ever get any better.It still all has me in its sharp talons of memory of trying to forget.How long do i have to sit and process?i don't want to "sit with the feelings".i have been trying to do that for years.i guess i am not working hard enough.i feel so desperate.
Hey everyone. I haven't been on here much lately since my father died and everything with the pandemic. I want to feel like I can contribute words that will give comfort to others but I just don't feel like I have any right now. But I got to get all this out. So this might be a long post. Thanks in advance if you read part or all of it.A friend of mine turned out not to be such a great friend...