Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
SO here I amstruggling again.
seems endless doesn't it.
Im not sure whether to go and get some meds or not?
Im in tears most days, no motivation at all.
I manage to get through the day but feel no joy.
Cant sleep, stare at the ceiling , so feel so tired every day.
I used to have panic attacks but Im not too bad with these at the moment, probably because Im not going out of the house much.
I have felt like this for a year or so now.
I am 45
Last year I met what I thought was a wonderful man, who I fell in love with, I relocated to be with him but two out of my three children would not come so they stayed with their Dad who lives near their friends and school. They are happy.
I was about to start the last year of my degree and was on a career path to teaching.
I gave up my studies at the request of my new Husband who is self-employed, I help in his business. I am a graphic designer. We work from home and have staff come in all week, which makes me uncomfortable. I have no motivation to clean this house/office, it has no joy for me, it feels like a workplace and I miss having a home.
But I have been struggling to find myself and get back to the fun happy person I was when we met. I just cannot adjust to this new life. I try and keep busy but it all seems so futile.
I know all the things I should be doing, exercise, things I enjoy, fresh air.
I have no idea how to be happy in this life.
It should be so good.
DO i need meds, would they help?
I have tried them before and the side effects are usually unhelpful.
seems endless doesn't it.
Im not sure whether to go and get some meds or not?
Im in tears most days, no motivation at all.
I manage to get through the day but feel no joy.
Cant sleep, stare at the ceiling , so feel so tired every day.
I used to have panic attacks but Im not too bad with these at the moment, probably because Im not going out of the house much.
I have felt like this for a year or so now.
I am 45
Last year I met what I thought was a wonderful man, who I fell in love with, I relocated to be with him but two out of my three children would not come so they stayed with their Dad who lives near their friends and school. They are happy.
I was about to start the last year of my degree and was on a career path to teaching.
I gave up my studies at the request of my new Husband who is self-employed, I help in his business. I am a graphic designer. We work from home and have staff come in all week, which makes me uncomfortable. I have no motivation to clean this house/office, it has no joy for me, it feels like a workplace and I miss having a home.
But I have been struggling to find myself and get back to the fun happy person I was when we met. I just cannot adjust to this new life. I try and keep busy but it all seems so futile.
I know all the things I should be doing, exercise, things I enjoy, fresh air.
I have no idea how to be happy in this life.
It should be so good.
DO i need meds, would they help?
I have tried them before and the side effects are usually unhelpful.
You met him last year... Is he your actual husband, or de-facto/common law husband???
I MOVED interstate for my husband - supposedly for a/his CAREER, but it was 'just' a job with NO prospects of advancement.
HE went down the road of his having his own business....
I helped him (on sites) during the week; actually worked on his jobs (installing, painting etc etc etc); worked MY own outside (Admin) job; look after our kids, home etc etc etc so on & so forth....
He would have to do invoicing... Guess who spent their weekends doing all of that too!!!!??? Yep, ME!
Don't get me wrong... There have been successful Husband/Wife businesses....
But it doesn't sound to me like you had any choice/say??? It sounds to me like 'it' was expected of you / expected of the 'dutiful' wife/partner....
YOUR 'wants & needs' need to be MET too!!!!
xo
My mom had position, she had respect, she had a great career, good money. Then my father let his ego get the best of him and he said, no wife is going to make more then me! He forced my mother to quit her job, in the end it ruined her life. Because my father brought us all down with him in his sinking ship.
We went from being a family of wealth who didn't have to struggle, to a poor family struggling each day to get by on SSI and dads pension after he retired. And now were left with this house of bad memories, and still poor. Lesson learned here?
NEVER EVER let a man dictate to you what you are going to do with your life. You need to make the best choices for you! Because you are important! Cause at the end of the day, when all the crap hits the fan, who are you going to count on? Thats right, yourself!
My mom depended on my father to pickup the slack after she gave up her job, he didn't, and our family went down the tubes, both physically, and mentally. And remember, not every single home business actually pans out, most of them fail, especially in this economy.
So your going to want to set something up as a backup plan to fall back on. Continue your studies, get your degree, and get a fine career. Your husband can easily hire a secretary if thats what he needs.
Ashley
I struggle every day, wondered if any one thought I may be depressed and meds would help me - or any other tips.
Nobody on here, me very much included, is qualified to say if you need medications, but I certainly don't think a trip to a psych doctor would be out of line. You're experiencing symptoms which could very well be anxiety, depression, or something else. It may be situational depression, which is triggered by an event or series of events, instead of a chemical imbalance.
Regardless, a good psych doctor will be able to assess your symptoms and suggest medications, if necessary. They might just suggest some lifestyle changes, or some therapy. Never know until you try.
If you had a bad experience with medications, by all means bring it up. They won't put you back on something you had a bad experience with, and knowing which one triggered the side effects can actually help them determine which one might be better for you. This is, of course, IF they determine you're a good candidate for medications.
Sorry that was long-winded. Wishing you peace, and some solutions, very soon :)
Sorry the gloss has worn off your relationship and reality has sunk in. That hurts when that happens. Hugs.
By all means, see your doctor about test-driving antidepressant medication. There are so many choices available now, more than ever. Surely you will find something to get you out of the doldrums.
Good luck and I hope you feel better and brighter soon.
You are not a happy person ...........I know that going through getting the right meds and right strengths takes time and isent easey . But wone you are dowen this far you risk going down even further and you don't want to be there .....I went there ..I ended up in the hospital ...they had to give me ect because I was going dowen to far to fast ......and we realy need to talk so it is important to have someone to talk to a councolar or a phicitrist .....and everything has to come out we weren't built to hold in painfupp things inside and if we try they only hurt us worse ........It took time for me to get the right set of meds and strengths with very little sidefects ....I get a little dry mouth that is it .......sa soon as you start to get a sidefects the doctor will want you to try for a littl while because we can some times get use to the med but if that doesent work you tell your doctor you don't want that med.....I am on 4 meds. I will keep you in my prayers .....god bless