Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
So i've been in inpatient treatment for 6 weeks now and tomorrow I should be being taken off my one to one obs.
Things are much better than when I first came in and I can actually say I'm feeling really good at the moment. But at the same time, I'm feeling extremely anxious. I think it's because I know things are starting to move on and I guess I'm a little scared of it all. It's making me quite emotional even though I feel happy... don't know if that makes any sense to anyone. My therapist has said before that with a lot of emotions, fear is the root cause and I agree. I'm also worried about falling into that BPD trap of 'abandonment issues'. I don't want to start to think I feel things that arn't really there, just because I don't want to be left alone. It is really scary but I've got to do it, I can't have someone hold my hand the rest of my life.
Does anyone else relate to being scared of moving on and getting better? It feels so unnatural after being depressed and hating myself for so long to actually think "i'm not that bad and I feel happy".
x-Bliss-x
Things are much better than when I first came in and I can actually say I'm feeling really good at the moment. But at the same time, I'm feeling extremely anxious. I think it's because I know things are starting to move on and I guess I'm a little scared of it all. It's making me quite emotional even though I feel happy... don't know if that makes any sense to anyone. My therapist has said before that with a lot of emotions, fear is the root cause and I agree. I'm also worried about falling into that BPD trap of 'abandonment issues'. I don't want to start to think I feel things that arn't really there, just because I don't want to be left alone. It is really scary but I've got to do it, I can't have someone hold my hand the rest of my life.
Does anyone else relate to being scared of moving on and getting better? It feels so unnatural after being depressed and hating myself for so long to actually think "i'm not that bad and I feel happy".
x-Bliss-x
Um why not?? Its one of the main reasons I come here to hold and have held an emotional hand.
That is such a great question, Bliss.
I think last year at this time I was frightened to move on and get better.
One year later, today for instance, I am actually HAPPY!
I was thinking about it today while I was driving.
I'm happy.
It can happen. It really can. You can move on and be well and actually be happy.
Hugs,
Bridget
PS
I too was in a hospital twice, so I know where you are coming from.
I've worked very hard to be well and to move on, and to be happy.
You can too. :)
I can't relate as I've never been hospitalized. I wanted to wish you good luck, though.
Sandi
I'm not sure what an obs is. Is it observation?
Regardless that feeling of maybe being happy, or nirmal as you used to be, is scary as many of us don't really even know what it is any more.
How will we know when we are back to normal? I haven't a clue frankly but I no longer worry about it or make comparisons about how I am today, 10 years ago and so on.
I know 10 years ago was a nightmare and today is OK and that's all I need to know.
Go with how you feel and don't create fears that aren't there if you can help it. Silly to say that to you really as it's not intentional if it does happen but you are aware of it and therefore should be able to prevent it.
In the end you don't need anybody to feel OK. You can do that for yourself and accept anything from others as a bonus, as well as learning to give back too. That's a powerful feeling in itself.
You'll be fine, just stand up and walk away.