Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I was adopted at age 2 and all my life I have been seeking love and acceptance from others. Now at age 44 I have 4 step children 2 who hate my guts literally and have stated this and there is nothing I can ever do to ever get them to like me. I know you don't know anything about me but I am genuinely a loving person and it kills me when people don't love me. I'm finally after 10years starting not to care about those 2 step children as I am realizing I can not control them. but only be happy within myself.
That's not why I'm writing.....I'm writing because of my adoptive mom. Something happened over this Easter weekend that I'm sooo ashamed of and guilt ridden about. 2 weeks b4 Easter I was really sick and my mom was suppose to come down but couldn't. I totally forgot about Easter and the week b4 Easter she called me back asking me if I was feeling better. I had said MUCH and she was very happy about that.
We then talked a little longer and then I had mentioned that I forgot Easter weekend was coming up and asked her what her plans were. My mom said that my sister and husband and 2 kids were coming down to their place and that "I was welcome to come down as well with my family" but to let her know soon so that she could make sure she had enough food.
I got a HUGE lump in my throat, swallowed my pride, and told my mom not to worry about it that I was going away to a cottage for the weekend.............TOTAL LIE. I felt awful lying but what bothered me is that my mom had invited my sister like a week b4 she even invited me.........I was an after thought and I felt horrible. Now I feel even worse for lying but what can I do about it now. If I tell her how I really feel..............she's like 75 years old and will either get really really upset about it or............tell me not to be like that and not to be so sensitive. Well yes I am sensitive about it..............I myself when ever I invite anyone of my family for functions would make sure everyone was equally invited and didn't feel like "AN AFTER THOUGHT".
It left my heart very heavily burdened because my adoptive mom and dad were the 2 people that meant the most 2 me in the world and now I feel crushed. I'm angry at everything right now.
I know I need counselling which I intend on getting..............but BLAHHHHH I don't even believe in them anymore........been to enough to know It takes everything inside myself to figure it out!
I just hope these meds kick in soon and I can stop roller coasting from high to low mood swings and that I don't depress my husband and kids with all of this.
P.S. My parents aren't getting any younger and I don't want to hold onto this guilt...........but I am very hurt inside.
Please help me
That's not why I'm writing.....I'm writing because of my adoptive mom. Something happened over this Easter weekend that I'm sooo ashamed of and guilt ridden about. 2 weeks b4 Easter I was really sick and my mom was suppose to come down but couldn't. I totally forgot about Easter and the week b4 Easter she called me back asking me if I was feeling better. I had said MUCH and she was very happy about that.
We then talked a little longer and then I had mentioned that I forgot Easter weekend was coming up and asked her what her plans were. My mom said that my sister and husband and 2 kids were coming down to their place and that "I was welcome to come down as well with my family" but to let her know soon so that she could make sure she had enough food.
I got a HUGE lump in my throat, swallowed my pride, and told my mom not to worry about it that I was going away to a cottage for the weekend.............TOTAL LIE. I felt awful lying but what bothered me is that my mom had invited my sister like a week b4 she even invited me.........I was an after thought and I felt horrible. Now I feel even worse for lying but what can I do about it now. If I tell her how I really feel..............she's like 75 years old and will either get really really upset about it or............tell me not to be like that and not to be so sensitive. Well yes I am sensitive about it..............I myself when ever I invite anyone of my family for functions would make sure everyone was equally invited and didn't feel like "AN AFTER THOUGHT".
It left my heart very heavily burdened because my adoptive mom and dad were the 2 people that meant the most 2 me in the world and now I feel crushed. I'm angry at everything right now.
I know I need counselling which I intend on getting..............but BLAHHHHH I don't even believe in them anymore........been to enough to know It takes everything inside myself to figure it out!
I just hope these meds kick in soon and I can stop roller coasting from high to low mood swings and that I don't depress my husband and kids with all of this.
P.S. My parents aren't getting any younger and I don't want to hold onto this guilt...........but I am very hurt inside.
Please help me
Annie
One thing cool last night was we had an ORANGE MOON :-) Hope someone else got to enjoy it just as much as I did!
~HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE~
My bf's father passed away on good Friday last year. Is the first anniversary of his death and he was much younger than your parents. You don't get them forever. They've taken care of you your whole life. They picked you to love! Maybe give them a little room for slack and mistakes in their older age?
(((HUGS)) to you at this time towards the loss of your bf's father. I am very greatful for all that I have, especially considering I was raised in a really stable environment.............I just need to get past this "fear of abandonment and pressure for everyone to like me phase.........although it really isn't a phase I've had it all my life.
I know my parents love me and I love them unconditionally...I never even stopped to think maybe they have their own worries and fears about getting older...time to get off my pity horse and start helping others again...and to show my support in my family!
Just hoping councelling and meds will help aid this process!!
Daily Strength rocks and I'm blessed to be part of such an amazing group! Don't know where I'd be today without you!
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.