Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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Parenting and depression

TooMuch
TooMuch

So my oldest child told me she wanted to see a therapist today. I am just so proud and impressed with her (she's sixteen) that she can see that she needs some help and is reaching out so effortlessly. It makes my own struggles with facing the fact that I need to see someone embarrassing. I am not worried for her, I know she is fine, she's just going through some really stressful stuff lately (changing schools, starting her first part time job, in her first real relationship, the loss of a friend/close relative of her best friend) and I am just (as always) so amazed by and impressed with her clarity. I feel at once proud that I raised such a strong confident child (she is amazing), and ashamed that I can't do things as simply and bravely as she is doing them. 


Then there are the anxiety chains of thought telling me what a horrible mother I am (to not notice she was suffering in any amount and to pass on my defective genetic material to her in the first place) and that she needs a therapist to talk about ME and what a horrible mother I am . . . and on and on. 


So I am pushing myself to NOT make it all about me, and to follow her lead in reaching out bravely for help. 


Parenting with depression is a mighty high uphill climb it seems. 

Ingi
Ingi
I wouldnt take it too seriously at this stage. Most children have issues with their parents. Ask your child if they are happy with you and keep the communication open. Tell then u havent been the perfect parent but you are trying and wiuld like to know where you can improve. She might feel becoz she is going to a therapist she has all the issues and that is not true. Everybody including parents siblings extended family has issues. What Im trying to say is not to make her feel alone and the only one with the "problem case".
Minidogs2
Minidogs2
That is great that she is willing to reach out to talk to a professional for help. Don't be hard on yourself and make it all about you as you said. You have played a huge part in helping her to grow up with confidence and clarity as you said. You have helped her to be able to trust someone enough to talk to them. That is a huge plus. The better you both do with your own issues, the better you will be at relating to each other and go forward living more productive and less stressful lives.
Gladdmatt
Gladdmatt
Well it seems to me you've done a lot of things right as a mother if your daughter has such clarity and honesty. Not to mention that she felt safe coming to you with her issues. It must be hard to let go when it comes to her therapy, but there can still be many things you can share together since you "speak the same language" when it comes to depression. Prayers for both of you.
AnxietyFreak40
AnxietyFreak40
YOU made her who she is today. Hold on the the pride and try to let the rest go. Hugs!