Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I am in a situation that is not good, where I am not feeling good. My workplace has become a hotbed of drama and accusations, and there are problems all the time. I don't feel like I have the energy to look for another job.
I also don't feel like things are working well with my coach, who functions as a sort of therapist, when I talk about difficulties with feeling lonely or with issues with relationships I am having, he keeps talking AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN, telling me to join a church. Twenty years ago, I went that route. One of the worst decisions I ever made. Never encountered more hate and rejection that ever in church. Tried a few of the same, then about fifteen years later, dared to try it again-no luck-trust me. One of the elder church people gave me a book called 'rejection junkies' because she knew that people were shunning me. It was the most judgmental, worst thing, I have ever been through. In fact, if he keeps forcing the issue, I think I am going to stop seeing him. It's true that I have some issues with current friends, but he feels that the relationships are not strong enough, not good enough, and we are just going in a broken record, in circles, because he doesn't approve of my group activities. He thinks they aren't "loving." I personally think that groups lead to other relationships, and I don't see why he is telling me to give up. Believe me, I tried and tried with church, I just don't fit with church, and the last time I tried church a couple of years ago-what a joke-yet another explosion of petty bullshit and drama, worse than I ever saw anywhere else.
I am not feeling great right now. I can't talk to my family about my job, career going really bad, they just scream and never listen, and things have been a bit strained with some friends lately. I feel like I just don't have very many places to turn, and it's been hard since my breakup, just kind of misplaced. A lot of the people that my coach basically keeps trying to force relationships with don't want them with me. He keeps telling me to call them and ask to do things, and it doesn't really work. They don't listen or call back, and if we do things, it's strange, they want to go to things that I don't like or click with, weird New Age healing stuff, and I can't relate. I feel like I'm being forced into some inauthentic life that isn't for me. What he doesn't seem to understand, is that some relationships seem to be forming on their own, apart from what he is insisting.
orion
I also don't feel like things are working well with my coach, who functions as a sort of therapist, when I talk about difficulties with feeling lonely or with issues with relationships I am having, he keeps talking AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN, telling me to join a church. Twenty years ago, I went that route. One of the worst decisions I ever made. Never encountered more hate and rejection that ever in church. Tried a few of the same, then about fifteen years later, dared to try it again-no luck-trust me. One of the elder church people gave me a book called 'rejection junkies' because she knew that people were shunning me. It was the most judgmental, worst thing, I have ever been through. In fact, if he keeps forcing the issue, I think I am going to stop seeing him. It's true that I have some issues with current friends, but he feels that the relationships are not strong enough, not good enough, and we are just going in a broken record, in circles, because he doesn't approve of my group activities. He thinks they aren't "loving." I personally think that groups lead to other relationships, and I don't see why he is telling me to give up. Believe me, I tried and tried with church, I just don't fit with church, and the last time I tried church a couple of years ago-what a joke-yet another explosion of petty bullshit and drama, worse than I ever saw anywhere else.
I am not feeling great right now. I can't talk to my family about my job, career going really bad, they just scream and never listen, and things have been a bit strained with some friends lately. I feel like I just don't have very many places to turn, and it's been hard since my breakup, just kind of misplaced. A lot of the people that my coach basically keeps trying to force relationships with don't want them with me. He keeps telling me to call them and ask to do things, and it doesn't really work. They don't listen or call back, and if we do things, it's strange, they want to go to things that I don't like or click with, weird New Age healing stuff, and I can't relate. I feel like I'm being forced into some inauthentic life that isn't for me. What he doesn't seem to understand, is that some relationships seem to be forming on their own, apart from what he is insisting.
orion
-
Do you think anxiety is genetic or comes from your environment? What are your thoughts?
-
Many of you know Mr K told me to "shut your mouth" in March 2025 when we took a road trip to Alpena Michigan. Since that time, we have had lots of ups and downs but I have never intentionally hurt Mr K in anyway. And when we first started dating in 2024 he let me know, although he is an engineer by degree, he has an extremely low EQ. Overall, he is ok (not off the charts nice like other guys in...
LUV YA! ;-]
I hope you find the quality support that is needed soon.
It definitely sounds as if your coach is getting too controlling. He may
very much want good things for you, but he can't make it happen. Also, church people can be some of the most vicious and gossiping people, anywhere -- the one place anyone should be able to turn when their life is in turmoil (whether I get an "Amen" or not).
I hope things get better, soon.
==============================================
"Help is the sunny side of control."
Your coach needs to respect your wishes. Since he doesn't seem to be able to do that, it would probably be best for you to find a new coach.
Church is not for everyone and he needs to respect that. It can be wonderful and a great way to make connections, but many people have issues with church for personal reasons and those reasons need to be respected.
If he thinks it is best for you to be a part of something, that's fine, but there are plenty of other options than just church.
You need to explain your feelings to him. You don't have to be forced into anything you don't want. Make it clear he needs to respect your wishes or you are giving him the boot.