Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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Inner Dialogue

amazinglyapril
amazinglyapril
I'm always trying to be one step ahead of everything in an attempt to be in control. To keep myself from getting hurt. It doesn't work. I struggle with this inner dialogue and sometimes think its my "gut" feelings telling me something - a hunch. Sometimes I've been right and because of this I always think I'm getting a gut feeling for a reason when really it's just those inner thoughts creating something that isn't necessarily true. Insecurities. Worry that someone doesn't like me and they're not confronting me on it. Worry that my boyfriend wants to break up but doesn't have the heart or the guts to do it. It's so crazy, and it ends up getting me in trouble. I'm in a bit of a fight with my boyfriend today because of this. I wish I would have just kept my mouth shut because now we're both at work and won't get to finish talking until late tonight, and it's been eating me up all day. I can't concentrate and my mind reels. It feels SO unhealthy.
ScaredandScarred
ScaredandScarred
I know that sort of inner dialogue well. Have you considered therapy or CBT as they may be able to help you to stop the inner dialogue and turn it into something more positive??
I know it's hard but if you can't cintinue the conversation with your BF until later try and put it out of your mind until then. Perhaps write him a letter with what you actually wanted to say so that you don't get the inner dialogue confusing things in the heat of the moment.
I know it's a lot easier said than done but maybe you need to work on trusting people to be honest. Yes you may do things that annoy people at times, but EVERYONE does! I'm sure you can think of annoying habits that your BF has but that doesn't mean that you want to break up with him!

Try and stay focused on the positive and when you notive the inner dialogue start try to distract your mind from it, perhaps name 5 things you can see/hear/smell/feel to get yourserlf thinking about something else

xxx
amazinglyapril
amazinglyapril
Thanks for the reply. I do have trust issues. I'm working hard to stay positive - it's working a bit. I have waves of emotions from - "I'm fine" to negative thoughts... more of the positive though, so that's a good sign. Again, thanks for the reply. It's just nice to have an ear.
ScaredandScarred
ScaredandScarred
Post as much as you like, it will help. Staying positive as best you can is probably going to help. You could even put positive notes around your desk and around the house to help you remain positive

xx
deleted_user
deleted_user
It is hard to tell between a gut feeling that's bang on and the crazy creating we do in our minds that feels like it might be true. And it's really tough to shut that busy, creative mind down. I find that it helps to keep my mind busy on creative tasks so that I can't creative destructive scenarios - I like to do puzzles or design clothes/buildings or read lots.

I really like the comment about stopping and naming 5 things you can see/hear/smell or feel to get yourself back in the moment. I'm going to try that. Sometimes I just stop and consciously breathe deeply. Lately I've started focusing only on sounds in the present moment - there are always some (a clock ticking, a bird chirping, a computer whizzing, ...)