This is a post I placed on the art-sharing site deviantart. It's something that was for them, but also somewhat for those who have been commenting on my stuff here. Even if you haven't, I hope that knowing how much my life has changed recently... may help others who are in similar positions? I don't know... but anyway... here goes...

(A POST ON ANOTHER SITE)

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There is nothing that makes me prouder than to see how far we've all come. We are part of a vast community of people who are sharing what they love and building off one another to better themselves. I look at my art, and I look at it since I started posting on here(Deviantart), and I know that every time I see someone favorite, or even view, my work, I feel inspired to create something even better. I want to make people things, and create beautiful worlds to live in, and thanks to all of you, I can! And I look at people who have been on here a long time, see their older stuff, and their newer stuff, and I know it's having the same effect on them! I am so happy to have had a chance to meet you all, and I hope to meet even more incredible people with amazing minds and talents in the years to come.

I want to share with you why I am writing this journal.

Yes, it is because of my happiness, and my hope for the future, but it is also because this happiness is such an incredible thing for me. It's healing me, more than anything else has. I have clinical depression, and it's not the sort that makes you sad, although sometimes it does. My type of depression is the kind that happens because your brain just can't create attachments, habits, and emotions the way a normal person can. For the past 11 years, since I was 9 years old, I have watched passively as life passed me by. I never made friends, and every friend I made always drifted away, because I would not be able to hold onto them. Relationships never worked, and if they did, they were incredibly long distance, and they usually faded away. I was alone. More alone than anyone should ever be. I felt like I didn't impact the world. Like I may as well not exist. I thought I had to escape into other peoples' worlds, into books and movies and video games where I was loved and wanted and useful, or if I was alone, it was because I chose it. It was safer, or quieter, but always something I could change just by going out and doing another quest.

You all changed that.

Every time I see a favorite or a view, or a comment, I see that someone sees me. Even if it's only for a moment, I am part of the world again, and I thank you all for that from the bottom of my heart. You let me bring the worlds I was trying to escape to into my life, and create my own to share with others.

I don't want this to fade away.

I'm going to keep fighting, and keep creating, and, I hope, keep meeting people and sharing the love and appreciation I feel with each and every one of them.

I'm sorry If all this seems a bit dramatic, but I just wanted to let you guys know how much I appreciate you guys!

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So yeah... I guess what I'm trying to say is... even amongst all the terrible things going on (some of you might know what I'm talking about)... sometimes just knowing that someone else knows you exist and likes what you do can help...