Hey.. I am so sorry that you are feeling so bad. I really don't want you to hurt yourself.. I have attempted a few times this year and realized that it wasn't the way out.. I can promise you that it just isn't worth it. You never know if things could get better a week from now, a month, a few months.. All of on here are here to help you. Please message me if you need help or just want to talk, I will be here - Jess

Please hold on. If you need to call 9-11 then do so. I hope that you will choose to stay with us here on DS and I hope that you will re-consider this action.

(((((((((((((((((((((Hugs))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

C.

I keep trying and pushing thru... and saying things vvill get better... but it doesnt.... it just never stops........ things arent handed to us so i keep trying to make my ovvn turn and it still fails....and ..i just dont belong in this time period..

I looked at your profile, and it sounds like you have several stressers in your life right now. There is a good chance that some of your depression and anxiety comes from these things. Once you get a handle on some of those issues I would expect your anxiety level to lower a bit.

Have you gotten any therapy? A good therapist can help a person get a handle on where they are, find where they want to be, and draw a path that gets us from where we are to where we want to be.

Medication can also help, but it is not a fix all.

The good news is that almost all our problems can be fixed (which also means we can learn how to avoid them, or minimize them, or ... ) As you feel more at home here, odds are you will meet people who have many of the same issues you have, and you can talk to them about how they have overcome them.

Gentle hugs, and welcome to the group!

i have been there many times,,,, I dont want to be there but my depresson is about being 58 and my career as a band director over due to breast cancer i am ok now ,, but I got raped after I quit teaching,, I was living alone ,, i was never out about mental ilness but when I did not have my purpose anymore I can tell you my life story and you would see why no one would be surprised,, I dont do it for one reason,, i dont want my students to see me go that way I know the despair the heartache nobody caring I used to have students meet me at the music room so happy to see me now I am totally alone no family few friends and alot of stressors I will stay if you will may be we can help some people just a thought,, teach them about compassion for others most dont know this hell of struggling do I live do i die,,,,, like I said ,, i am here bmw

I feel that way too. But I think it's not really because of a depression, it's more like I'm just tired of the struggles and the constant bad things happening. I have dreams and goals and it doesn't take much to make me happy. But things have just been too bad for too long. I feel defeated. The only thing that keeps me around is my three dogs that I love dearly. They rely on me and I can't leave them alone in this world. But that's about it. Maybe if you have someone in your life who would be devastated, that will be enough to keep you plugging away. You surely are not alone in this.

i tyred the other day i didn have the courage to do it :( but tell me one thing why do u want 2?

Hunny word of advice.... leave it alone.... give yourself some time, time to be stupid, an allotment of life to be special, hay then there is a day with your soon to be child...hay could happen.....

give up the death wish, kick them stupid demons of stupidity out the door...down the road....shit the bed just commit them to murder...BUT...

give yourself a go at this thing that is life....it is kind of actually fun....make memories even if people tell you 'that is wrong' it will always be your memory...

dog hunter speaks alot of truth life can be fine at times and make us feel alot of diffrent emotions but hey without emotions what would be the point in feeling anything at all

I am sorry....... and I know I am jumping in on your post about wanting to figure out a way to kill yourself. I saw it earlier.

I don't comment on posts about people wanting to kill themselves because it is too upsetting to me. I sure as hell would never try to help someone figure out how do do it.

Now I am going to post.
I hope you don't find the courage to do it.

I am sitting here watching news coverage of the horrible tornadoes that hit Oklahoma.......... there are right now 51 confirmed dead and atleast TWENTY of them are children.. and 24 more kids are missing from an elementary school.

These people didn't have a choice to live or die... Their lives were taken away in a heartbeat............ because of a tornado...... so many parents have lost their kids now....... little kids....... and families are destroyed....... not just the kids.. moms.. dads.. sisters.. brothers.. friends. Aunts.. Uncles.. Grandparents.......

and you are trying to figure out how to kill yourself.........

I am sorry.. I am not .. i am NOT undermining the pain you are in.. but you know what? you have a CHOICE to live right now.. and I sincerely hope that you find some help.. that you get some help, because I know it is out there. Please.... Please... get some help....... you have a choice to live...... I pray you choose to live.

I wish you peace and healing.

LMT

Please keep having the courage to live. (Hugs)

Straight up....life is fucked up most of the time. I think its just as fucked up if not more to leave people like that.

After I lived, I decided to reboot. Change everything around you. Give that a try, dont give up. Giving up is not cool to the people who will miss the shit out of you. Its not poetic either.

No I dont have therapy right novv I dont have a vehicle to get to see anyone nor could I set the appointment up myself if I had one. My anxiety issues is that bad that I can't call people on the phone or go out by myself. I try. I can go inside the gas station if i need too.

I'm just not good at functioning and I have been trying I vvas in therapy once vvhen i finally convinced my mother to take me as a teenager but vvhen vve lost the insurance and my dad lost his job I had to stop going.

And to the nice lady vvho brought up OK i vvould have gladly changed places vvith anyone in OK so they could have continued living.

I am just not meant for this vvorld and I do not belong here. It's not that I don't vvant to live exactly. It's that I don't vvant to live here.

Things got better for a little vvhile but not much and things from my past or i should say people ..........vvho i love and supported keep finding vviggling their vvay back in and making it vvorse. it's not getting better and the system doesnt vvork like they tell you they should.

Also thank you guys for your support and kind vvords....

i just feel really numb right novv and it just doesnt seem like their are any other options... I vvill never be Normal.

Sweetie, I'm so sorry our in so much pain, but things will get better it just might not seem like it NOW but things WILL get better. And we are all here for you and we care about you. Please don't do this. Get help please