Sounds like anxiety stemming from depression. The 2 are very connected, at least in my experience. It's important to treat both. I hope you have a good psychiatrist you are working with?

Find a good pdoc and tell him or her your symptoms you jus explained. I hear ya wishing I was my old self too.

I read your post and re read it a couple of times. Your symptoms are for no reason? . Your second sentence says you are having intrusive thoughts which will cause nervous anxiety to appear to come out of nowhere.
I think we all feel better when we are outside in the sun or fresh air rather than being in the house where I think we have more negative thoughts. There isn't the beauty surrounding us like we enjoy outside.
It sounds like you might have Agoraphobia or a form of it when you get out into crowds such as the grocery store. My best friend use to have to walk with me to the grocery store because my symptoms became so severe and got worse once inside the building. It sounded like it was a lot noisier than it actually was.
Anxiety will cause racing thoughts as well. Klonapin is a very heavy anti anxiety med and can be harder to get off of than an opiate for some people so when it wears off, all of your fears come racing back. Does any of this sound possible? Have you joined the anxiety group here on DS? I think that would be an extreme help for you. Keep posting and keep letting us know how you are doing, I would advise talking to your doctor and telling him/her exactly what you have told us here. It's possible the medication isn't the right one for you but you have to be upfront with your doc so he knows what is best to prescribe. Hugs for you

I would ask myself what the 'intrusive' thoughts are. 'intrusive' just means you don't want to think that: but are the thoughts true, or not true?

Sometimes we have to go through things to get out the other side, and it's my belief that bad thoughts have to be thunk. And fully thunk. If we want them gone, we have to allow them to express their chemical charge in our brain; we have to let ourselves think those thoughts, without necessarily buying into them being true or requiring any particular consequence.

We just have to let them get thought.

As to the drugs: it's my opinion that if you are taking pills on an as required basis, you will constantly be going in and out of withdrawals and chemical highs. I believe in stabilising so that there are no lows and highs. That way any chemical reaction can be removed as a cause for how you're thinking or what you're feeling. So if you need to be on something, get yourself on a stable low dose that is a constant dose, not an as required dose.

That's my belief anyway. You can't know how much is you and how much is chemicals when you are fiddling about with chemicals. And you can't know how 'intrusive' your thoughts are unless you let them in, and then see if they continue to intrude or if they allow you to move on from them.

It sounds like severe anxiety along with depression. I say that because you described me in a way.

I take Klonopin twice a day. 1mg in the morning, and then 1mg in the evening when I feel it wearing off. I feel much more even now that I do this instead of just 2mg at night. Maybe your doctor would let you split up your dosage a little bit to keep you more even.

There are dozens of possibilities. No one here could diagnose another. You MUST pursue a clear and complete diagnosis from a qualified doctor.