Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I am so sick of this.
Okay,
well, my mom, works 24 F**king 7, and shes the one who pays all the bills and groceries.
However i have a step dad who doesn't do anything to help my mom out financially, and its getting to the point where we have NO money anymore. And all he does is sits around and complains about how we have no money but yet, doesn't do anything about it, its so frustrating. All he does is YELLS at my mom who works her butt off, 11pm-7am and its so bad that i step in to try and stop it, i know i shouldn't do that because there is really nothing i can do about it, but i hate the way he treats my mom, I mean she does everything to support this family, and im tired of her being depressed and in this horrible rut that she cant get her self out of. its frustrating.
Also, im always arguing with my step dad because he doesn't understand nothing, hes the one that complains how we don't have money but yet doesn't do a damn thing to help! He always complains when me, my mom , and my sister have told him PLENTY of times to get a J.O.B. I mean i would work, but the thing is i have to go to school and study and make sure i can graduate this year, and thats a lot of pressure for someone(especially if they have a anxiety disorder). I wish i could do anything to help my mom out financially. But i don't know what to do.
and im tired of arguing with him day after day, about the same old stuff, its ridiculous, Its almost as if hes using my mom for the little money that she does have. Im so tired of him, and i can tell and know that my mom is very unhappy most of the time, especially now and even when they HAD a little money she was never really happy. and its sad. he doesn't even really talk to her all he does is sits in the chair and sleeps, and when he does talk to her its only for like an hour, they don't even talk. its depressing.
I feel bad for my mom, and i hate seeing her so depressed all the time because i in fact know how hard it is to be depressed because i am at the moment. Its a struggle for her, and he doesn't even realize it. He should be grateful and happy that she puts up with his B.S day after day, after day. I would have booted him out along time ago, but i think shes scared to be alone. I just don't know what to do anymore. I love my mom and i want to help her but im lost.
Okay,
well, my mom, works 24 F**king 7, and shes the one who pays all the bills and groceries.
However i have a step dad who doesn't do anything to help my mom out financially, and its getting to the point where we have NO money anymore. And all he does is sits around and complains about how we have no money but yet, doesn't do anything about it, its so frustrating. All he does is YELLS at my mom who works her butt off, 11pm-7am and its so bad that i step in to try and stop it, i know i shouldn't do that because there is really nothing i can do about it, but i hate the way he treats my mom, I mean she does everything to support this family, and im tired of her being depressed and in this horrible rut that she cant get her self out of. its frustrating.
Also, im always arguing with my step dad because he doesn't understand nothing, hes the one that complains how we don't have money but yet doesn't do a damn thing to help! He always complains when me, my mom , and my sister have told him PLENTY of times to get a J.O.B. I mean i would work, but the thing is i have to go to school and study and make sure i can graduate this year, and thats a lot of pressure for someone(especially if they have a anxiety disorder). I wish i could do anything to help my mom out financially. But i don't know what to do.
and im tired of arguing with him day after day, about the same old stuff, its ridiculous, Its almost as if hes using my mom for the little money that she does have. Im so tired of him, and i can tell and know that my mom is very unhappy most of the time, especially now and even when they HAD a little money she was never really happy. and its sad. he doesn't even really talk to her all he does is sits in the chair and sleeps, and when he does talk to her its only for like an hour, they don't even talk. its depressing.
I feel bad for my mom, and i hate seeing her so depressed all the time because i in fact know how hard it is to be depressed because i am at the moment. Its a struggle for her, and he doesn't even realize it. He should be grateful and happy that she puts up with his B.S day after day, after day. I would have booted him out along time ago, but i think shes scared to be alone. I just don't know what to do anymore. I love my mom and i want to help her but im lost.
Unfortunately, you cannot live someone elses life for them. YOU realise things that your Mother chooses to accept. We cannot demand that someone lives their life how we prefer them to. So far, your Mother accepts things as they are, and until she doesn't, there is little you can do. It is a good thing for you to recognize that. Everyone does what they "think" is the right thing to do with their lives, and for whatever reason, Mom feels she is doing what she needs to do, even if you don't understand it.
I notice you are 19 years old. You will likely soon get out on your own and his behavior will no longer DIRECTLY effect you. It will result in some things becoming easier on your Mom. She has to choose her life, and what we think she should do doesn't matter, .. she is an adult and gets to make her own choices.
I hope you make plans to take on your own life and leave what bothers you behind, and to her to decide if she wants to sustain it or change it.
Good luck, .. try to maintain harmony until you are out and on your own. You may possibly be able to help her more effectively then too.
i'm curious if you've ever had a talk to your mom about how you feel? perhaps that may shake her up and make her realise he isn't worth it.
also, is he physically violent? if so, she may fear him..which is more complicated.
xoxo
It is just that who has the responsibility? In my view, it is entirely Mom. If Mom had posted, I would tell her what I think she should do, .. but in this case, it is telling daughter what I think Mom should do, and it seems a little foolhardy.
Also, daughter is not a minor, .. as if that somehow has something to do with it (not sure what though).
It would sure have some value if Daughter told Mom what she thinks,.. but exactly what kind of results to expect would be hard to say.
it's just that...if her mama doesn't know how affected her kids are by this..it...well. not that the daughter should be confrontational with mama...but mama needs to know how the rest of the family is hurt by her decision to be with this dude.
after that..if she isn't strong enough to kick him out...just gotta try and be supportive of her..and like u say...let her to it. : /
sad tho.