Depression Support Group
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I have done amazingly well for a severe BiPolar, I think. I have had a few struggles along the way but function very well considering. My issue is- My 2 children (2 boys- 10 & 11) tell me they love me. I tell them I love them alot more often.
My children (especially Nikki) calls me a freakin retard when he is mad
He will not do his homework when I politely ask. This can take several hours of being sweet and asking nicely until I finally loose my temper, Something MIKE DOES NOT UNDERSTAND should never ever happen
The children do not listen to me. They have been taught by their father thru example that they don't have to if they don't want to.
If the ask me to go somewhere and I say no- they will ask or call to ask their dad. (mostly Nikki) Of course he says YES, which makes me look like a JOKE and teached them BY EXAMPLE---THEY DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO ME OR DO WHAT I ASK AT ALL.
If they want a new video game, they ask me and if I say no....they ask or call and ask their dad. (mostly Nikki). Of course he says YES, which makes me look like a JOKE and teached them BY EXAMPLE---THEY DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO ME OR DO WHAT I ASK AT ALL BECAUSE I AM A JOKE AND IT IS OKAY TO TREAT THEIR MOTHER OR ANY WOMAN WITH SUCH DISRGARD AND DISRESPECT.
Mike has bought the boys a computer & paid for online games for their computer.
Mike bought them the largest Television between the 4 of us personally.
Mike has bought them a WII
Mike has bought them a Playstation 2
Mike has bought them a Playstation 3
Mike has bought them an XBox360
Mike has spent well over 1,000.00 on video games for all the machines and will continue every time they say they want a new one-- although over 95% of all the games are played once or twice and kicked aside because they are "boring".
They have listened to their father call their mother a fat fuck
fat ass
fat boy
fucking retard
loser
hog face
worthless peice of dog shit
dumb fuck
ugly
disgusting
loser
and so many other humiliating and degrading names that they have become acclimated to what they have learned is an acceptable way for a man to treat a woman.
When I go for hours NICELY asking the kids to do their homework and never raise my voice or lay a hand on them and they absolutely refuse to do as I ask Mike for help. He always treats me as if I were incompetant---which I am because he has the boys trained to do as they want and fuck mom...who gives a shit.
I am tired of trying. He has NEVER EVER EVER EVER allowed me to discipline the boys and now after it is too late because of their age, he is mad because for "some reason" I can't get them to listen to me and DAMN IT!!! Why the hell am I getting sooooo upset?!
My children (especially Nikki) calls me a freakin retard when he is mad
He will not do his homework when I politely ask. This can take several hours of being sweet and asking nicely until I finally loose my temper, Something MIKE DOES NOT UNDERSTAND should never ever happen
The children do not listen to me. They have been taught by their father thru example that they don't have to if they don't want to.
If the ask me to go somewhere and I say no- they will ask or call to ask their dad. (mostly Nikki) Of course he says YES, which makes me look like a JOKE and teached them BY EXAMPLE---THEY DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO ME OR DO WHAT I ASK AT ALL.
If they want a new video game, they ask me and if I say no....they ask or call and ask their dad. (mostly Nikki). Of course he says YES, which makes me look like a JOKE and teached them BY EXAMPLE---THEY DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO ME OR DO WHAT I ASK AT ALL BECAUSE I AM A JOKE AND IT IS OKAY TO TREAT THEIR MOTHER OR ANY WOMAN WITH SUCH DISRGARD AND DISRESPECT.
Mike has bought the boys a computer & paid for online games for their computer.
Mike bought them the largest Television between the 4 of us personally.
Mike has bought them a WII
Mike has bought them a Playstation 2
Mike has bought them a Playstation 3
Mike has bought them an XBox360
Mike has spent well over 1,000.00 on video games for all the machines and will continue every time they say they want a new one-- although over 95% of all the games are played once or twice and kicked aside because they are "boring".
They have listened to their father call their mother a fat fuck
fat ass
fat boy
fucking retard
loser
hog face
worthless peice of dog shit
dumb fuck
ugly
disgusting
loser
and so many other humiliating and degrading names that they have become acclimated to what they have learned is an acceptable way for a man to treat a woman.
When I go for hours NICELY asking the kids to do their homework and never raise my voice or lay a hand on them and they absolutely refuse to do as I ask Mike for help. He always treats me as if I were incompetant---which I am because he has the boys trained to do as they want and fuck mom...who gives a shit.
I am tired of trying. He has NEVER EVER EVER EVER allowed me to discipline the boys and now after it is too late because of their age, he is mad because for "some reason" I can't get them to listen to me and DAMN IT!!! Why the hell am I getting sooooo upset?!
You shouldn't have to put up with verbal abuse and disrespect. There is help available out there.
It really sounds like you're a great mum and you handle bipolar and parenting well, you just need some help having your voice heard in the family.
Good luck and hugs to you!
Just a question. If he's doing all this to you then why are you still with him. I mean I realize you have kids with him but have you at least had a talk to him about it.? Maybe you need to sit down with the Father and have a serious talk about it. If it doesn't go anywhere than you need to take additional steps so he knows you mean business.
Or if that doesn't go anywhere maybe you can have another male friend have a talk with him. That might be the best solution. Someone you trust.
I don't have any friends- which may sound stupid- I do however, have 3 mom's I say hi to or breifly chat with at the bus stop almost every morning (we don't discuss personal issues)
Live in a big house- have my own room (he lives upstairs (about 9 - 10 years now) It's weird but I think I have gotten used to having a place to live.
I don't even have any money saved to move out. Can't move back home to "mommma".
K2- He is definitely undermining me. He's old school from Detroit and raised at a time and in a way where what he is doing in acceptable. Wich I knew this when I met him.
Liza- I am going to look and see if I can find a local support group or talk to a social worker.
I don't get much of a chance to talk to him. I am usually cut off. He doesn't have time to deal with me.