Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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I'm feeling really depressed

carolk1955
carolk1955

I'm living in a personal care home--this particular one since March of this year, when the one I'd been living in the previous 3 years closed. I hate this place. The food is terrible. I don't know anybody, I have no friends here. My husband passed away in June 2017. We had good times and bad times. At least then I had a life. I had a nice apartment full of stuff and a car. When he died I lost all of that. This is not my home town. I miss my home town terribly. It is 85 miles away and I'd love to move back. I'm on Social Security and I have no family left. I don't see how I could afford the move. That county--Berks County--has been written up as one of the best places to live in Pennsylvania. I miss so many things about it. I have to move out of this place by the end of August. I've applied to public housing. All I can think about is how lonely I'll be. I can't think of the last time I was happy or had a good time since my husband died. We were married for 25 years. We went out to eat alot, got ice cream cones in the summertime and went to the New Jersey beach. We spent holidays with my parents until they died. We hiked at numerous state parks on weekends. All that is over, gone. I don't have a way of getting out of this home to go anywhere. No chance of being able to afford a car again. I really miss driving. I drove for 30 years and still have a valid driver's license. I have no life anymore. And I don't know how to get one. I've been in therapy forever it seems. I like my therapist but it doesn't seem like I'm making progress. Maybe I should look for a new therapist?

Tired
Tired
Talk to your current therapist about how your feeling before looking for a new therapist.
maria718
maria718
About moving---this is how I look at it---I've moved around a lot in my life. I always looked at it as exciting, a new beginning, a new life. How I'll have a new apartment, I can pick out things for the apartment, hopefully meet new people, etc. I know you lost a lot. There's nothing you can do about it to bring it back. Try and look at this as a new adventure. I'm an older female also, and I've been thinking of moving in the near future, and that's how I try to think about it.
Bobby5000
Bobby5000
A lot of what you say makes sense. Not sure what stops you from working to the goal of getting back to Bucks County and periodically going down the shore. Maybe you could find a lady friend, share space, and get a secretarial job to support yourself. There is a dramatic shortage of secretaries and in the right circumstance you could find a job. Places like Amazon are hiring too. e
jannytheresa
jannytheresa
Hi
What you're describing sounds like profound grief. You've experienced
so many changes and losses. Someone mentioned a therapist/ counselor.
That might be a really good place to start. What you are describing sounds kind of depressing. A good counselor might be able to provide an outside
perspective on things. They seem very hopeless right now but there might be solutions to what seem like impossible problems.
In the meantime I am sending big hugs to you.
Bluebird20
Bluebird20
I hear how unhappy you are. I think as Maria moving could be a good change. A lot of times public housing of some types have activities you could get involved in. You could make some friends and start making a new life for yourself. I think that was a good idea you applied for public housing if your not happy in a personal care facility. Many times they provide transportation to places which would help you adapt to not having a car.
gracenme
gracenme
Maybe put your name in places , low income senior living in bucks county. Your rent will be 30% of your income. Call area on aging maybe they can help put your name into those places. Or they can call and have them mail you an application.
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