What had you defeated? That's the first step. Knowing what is driving you down and addressing it to make things better.

I'm so sorry for this pain your suffering. I know the feeling of being not in control, being the passenger of life and not the driver.
Please try and find something personal in your life you like, some kind of hobby that you can go to when your feeling down. Someplace inside that you can be in control. Mine was art... Drawing and painting that was totally mine and kept me happy. Try and find something you enjoy, music, exercise, reading, art, dance.
I saw in another entry you asked why can't I be like them??? The skinny girls, the popular girls. I can almost guarantee you that they may look happy on the outside but inside there far different. They put on a mask and hide so they don't have to ask the same questions you did. They best person to look deeply at is there one looking back at you in the mirror. One day soon you'll be the driver.

You can not move forward till you give voice to what is disturbing you. Once you name a thing, you have power over a thing.

Itz, we can all sit here and provide positive quotes and while the intention is well meant, those that are in the same place you are often do not find comfort in them. I can sit here and tell you you're not alone (you aren't) but again it provides little reassurance. The hardest thing about depression is getting the help you deserve and need because you feel you don't deserve it. In our darkest moments we have to try and crawl for every inch no matter how minuscule the gain. If you don't have a therapist, get one. Depression is not a choice, suffering is not a choice. Getting help is... but it takes a great deal of courage to do so. You've already shown you have that courage by coming here. As hard as it is... you have to try. You have the strength to do so... otherwise you wouldn't have come this far.

I think you are attached to something? What is it ? Achievement? What ? Then look at that and say who sold me that thing and is that a good thing? Achievement is fine if you want to better yourself but is it because you want to be like everyone else ? Society pushes shit on us. You got to figure out what you want not what THEY want. Marketing companies or a society that wants you on a more more thread Mill.

I'm so sorry for what you're feeling. Can you describe more specifically what's bothering you? Have you talked to anyone about this, a parent or a counselor?