zIt is not always easy for us that suffer with mental illnesses, but it looks like you have one beautiful reason to live for in your avatar.

Hi, I have felt like suicide often and came close, but when I didn't do it, a day would come along when something beautiful would happen and I tell myself it was worth going through the pain to be here to see this. Depression is a very painful disease and its invisible. You have to believe in yourself that you are suffering and not let others criticisms hurt you- just in case that has happened to you. Accepting limitations on the days you feel bad helps me.

I am sorry that you feel this way and am sending hugs of healing and encouragement to you.(((HUG)))
You are NOT a horrible mother and you ABSOLUTELY deserve to have your son. You gave him life and that is a very precious gift indeed.
I'm not going to give you a bunch of cliches about the sun coming out tomorrow and that better days lie ahead. Because, right now, that does not mean a hill of beans to you. At this particular moment in your life, life is sucking royally and you do not want to be here. Sometimes I get irritated when someone says, "It's going to be okay." I appreciate the thought, but the truth of things is that the space in between now and okay is damned dark and extremely painful.
When one is in great pain, being told to look forward or ahead does not produce immediate results. And when one is in pain, they want immediate relief.
I cannot take away your pain. If I could, it would have disappeared the moment I read your words. What I CAN do is sit right next to you in my heart and hold your hand and tell you that you are not alone. I care for you and want very much for you to remain with us on this earth.
The Lord bless you and keep you.
Hugggggsssss to you.

Is that your son in your picture?

That's really sad if you are feeling that way hun. Seriously. You should talk to somebody. I'm here if anything. If I was in your position I couldn't possibly even have that thought cross my mind. Sometimes life is worth living for others when it isn't worth living for yourself. You should seriously give that sentence a second thought.

One thing is talking about suicide, the next thing is actually doing it.