Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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LavenderLove 04/03/2009

I have had such severe depression this year. Things just have hit the fan all over my life..but at the same time things aren't that bad I just suffer from depression and my doom and gloom thinking takes over. Over the past year I found out my mom was sick with Hep-C, she got thyroid cancer, my maternal grandfather was diagnosed with terminal cancer, my uncle was arrested and is serving time in prison, my dog was paralyzed from his middle back down for 3 months (yeay acupuncture!), my dog was diagnosed with a collapsing trachea, i lost my job, I was diagnosed with hashimotos and interstitial cystitis, my paternal grandmother collapsed and has permanent brain damage last week and my paternal grandfather collapsed last week as well and they aren't sure why yet..They are both still in the hospital.

I am away at graduate school in the north east..my family is in florida. I am alone up here...I have a bf that i love but he lives here his whole family is here he has no idea how I feel! Anyway I was supposed to drive home with him next week for my spring break but he had his own family emergency and its looking like he wont be able to do the drive with me and my 2 doggies. The thing is I cant fly home its too expensive and I have to have someone watch my dogs which is very expensive. I dont have any friends that can drive with me.

My mom told me to stop being so selfish and just not come home. But I feel like this is the therapy I need. If I dont go home I think I am going to break even more than I am already broken. I feel so broken and so sad and so alone and no one seems to understand. They all think im being selfish..im hurting and I just want to be home with my family. I want to go see my grandparents in the hospital and visit my new baby niece and just hug my parents.... Maybe I am being selfish.. maybe I should just stay up here..

But I am considering driving home alone. I know its a LONG drive it would be about 24 hours straight through but I would stop over night..I don't know what to do... What would you guys suggest?

WanderingVet 04/03/2009

It is up to you. You are entitled to make your own decisions and do what you want to do. If you want to go home, and you can, do it.

Make sure your car is in good condition, that you can find motels that accept pets, have time to do it, do it safely. If all that falls in place, go.

Get plenty of rest. Falling asleep at the wheel on a long trip is common. Be very responsible about it, plan it, and go.

deleted_user 04/03/2009

you want my honest opinion?? I say GO! As WanderingVet said, make sure your vehicle is in good condition and get plenty of rest before you head out. Take some CD's, check out some audio books from the library to keep your mind occupied and pack some muchies. Road trips are fun and you will have your 2 doggies to keep you company.

Good Luck!

deleted_user 04/03/2009

X3- As we get older- we all say "I wish I had taken more time to enjoy the good things along the way". A road trip can be such great therapy, and I would personally not trade in any of the times that I decided to throw caution to the wind and travel.

GO FOR IT !

LavenderLove 04/03/2009

Thanks guys! I actually am renting a car because my car is in florida I didnt bring it to ny. So I am renting a car for 48 hours to give myself time to rest and take it easy. The only thing is..My mom is going to cancel the reservation. Even though I am 26 years old she still wants to control every aspect of my life and if she decides something is a bad decision well than there is no other way...however my sister said F it just go..she said she will try to talk to my mom for me in person. If that doesnt work than I was thinking of lying and telling her I canceled the reservation and just going anyway...ugh..I dont want to lie but I want to go home!

deleted_user 04/03/2009

Drive, go home. Find out if it helps or not. If you don't go you will ruminate over this for a long time so just do it.

Sleep in the car when you get tired, just pull over and nap. Take it easy and it'll be fine.

WanderingVet 04/03/2009

hmmmmm. I suppose you need your Mom's 'help' to go to college. I will be glad when you are not under her thumb .. no reason to be beholdin' to her. See, when I said you can do what you want to do, not if you are under the control of someone else. Mom seems to be the core of all the anxiety. I think ultimately, you will be happier when you can break the 'hold' she has. I think it should be a priority.

In the meantime, you have to keep the peace. I wish you good luck. More than anything, I want you to have a SAFE trip. Be careful.

LavenderLove 04/03/2009

The thing is I lost my job and haven't been able to find another one in this stupid economy recession crap so I do have to answer to my mom and since she has a lot of psychological problems of her own (Depression anxiety control issues..yada yada yada) she tries to take control of everything and she can't handle it she breaks down and freaks out on us...yea she is a huge source of my anxiety but I love her so much and I want to go be with her cause I know she is hurting badly right now and I think we need each other..

WanderingVet 04/03/2009

I am sure you love your mother and she loves you. I hope it all works out very well for you. Forgive any of my inappropriate assumptions, please.

LavenderLove 04/03/2009

All is good WanderingVet you are right in the sense that I need to break the hold she has over me and realize that I can make my own decisions and the world won't shatter if they aren't what she thinks is the right decision. I mean I have done that in the past - its usually the core of our fights but than she praises me later one for being so strong and independent...I think her and I fight so much because we are a lot alike..oh yes I can be very stubborn too :) Just ask my bf haha...

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