Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
Hello,
I just dont seem to care anymore, about anything, my life, my future, day to day activities, etc.
I just got divorced (was a good thing, I initiated it). So that took a lot of stress off. I do miss my kids, but also feel bad when I dont have them that I do like having some time alone.
I have had depression (of some degree) for a LONG time.
I know one big issue/problem is that currently I dont have any friends (that I see/hang out with often). I have friends and I had a group of friends that we would hang out every week but that went away a bit since everyone got busy (with night school, outside activities, etc). So I do not see any friends at all so most of the time when I dont have my kids I am home alone unless I am running errands (again I know a big issue) but since I have had depression this is not a new thing for me, maybe a little worse because of lack of friends, but nothing new.
I used to do a lot of stuff (even with ex wife nagging/bitching/etc at me) reason I got divorced in first place, but I still did them.
It is starting to affect my work (well has been for a while, but getting worse unless I have a big project that I get excited about).
I know I shouldn't (especially since I am taking medications) but I tend to drink too often. Not tons every night, but way more often then I should. I can go a week (or weeks) without drinking, then go back to drinking again (to self medicate). I know not a good thing and I know alcohol is a depressant and all that good stuff.
Biggest thing is that I have NO motivation at ALL and no energy at ALL. No prospects/ideas/plans for future, just living life day to day like I should, nothing to look forward to (not much money to do stuff to look forward to things). Even when i do have something to look forward to, I dont get excited/energized/etc.
Even lately when I do have my kids I LOVE them more then anything in the entire world (and only reason the divorce did not happen sooner then it did) but I am finding myself not enjoying that time with them much or at all anymore and sometimes it feels like a chore, which makes me feel even worse.
I have found sites like meetup.com (if thats what it is called. Signed up for dating sites (not many reply, its either my profile, or pictures (not the greatest or good looking guy but not horrible either).
I just keep thinking whats the point in life (I guess that is the biggest question everyone asks) .
As I said I have been this way for most of my life (with some good and some bad) but lately it has gotten worse and I feel like I am just going through the motions.
I have things I want to do (learn to play piano, take scuba diving lessons, rock climbing lessons, and much more) but either dont have someone to do it with (I wouldnt mind doing it alone but some things you need a partner for) or even something as simple as learning to juggle or just clean up my garage, but just do not feel like it and feel like whats the point.
NO worries no thoughts of suicide aside from thinking about it very briefly and rejecting the idea and it will never happen, if for the only reason so I am here for my kids.
I am shy until I get to know someone, and the weird part is I am more comfortable talking to women then men. I feel weird calling one of my guy friends and asking if they want to do something or jutst hang out/etc. This may come from working at a movie theater when I was younger mainly around girls/women or I just feel more comfortable around them. I have NO homophobic tenancies (I know (or knew) people that are gay and that does not bother me, it wouldnt bother me if someone was purple (I may look at them weird, but it wouldnt bother me).
So anyone going through something similar or have any suggestions or anything?
Thank You.
I just dont seem to care anymore, about anything, my life, my future, day to day activities, etc.
I just got divorced (was a good thing, I initiated it). So that took a lot of stress off. I do miss my kids, but also feel bad when I dont have them that I do like having some time alone.
I have had depression (of some degree) for a LONG time.
I know one big issue/problem is that currently I dont have any friends (that I see/hang out with often). I have friends and I had a group of friends that we would hang out every week but that went away a bit since everyone got busy (with night school, outside activities, etc). So I do not see any friends at all so most of the time when I dont have my kids I am home alone unless I am running errands (again I know a big issue) but since I have had depression this is not a new thing for me, maybe a little worse because of lack of friends, but nothing new.
I used to do a lot of stuff (even with ex wife nagging/bitching/etc at me) reason I got divorced in first place, but I still did them.
It is starting to affect my work (well has been for a while, but getting worse unless I have a big project that I get excited about).
I know I shouldn't (especially since I am taking medications) but I tend to drink too often. Not tons every night, but way more often then I should. I can go a week (or weeks) without drinking, then go back to drinking again (to self medicate). I know not a good thing and I know alcohol is a depressant and all that good stuff.
Biggest thing is that I have NO motivation at ALL and no energy at ALL. No prospects/ideas/plans for future, just living life day to day like I should, nothing to look forward to (not much money to do stuff to look forward to things). Even when i do have something to look forward to, I dont get excited/energized/etc.
Even lately when I do have my kids I LOVE them more then anything in the entire world (and only reason the divorce did not happen sooner then it did) but I am finding myself not enjoying that time with them much or at all anymore and sometimes it feels like a chore, which makes me feel even worse.
I have found sites like meetup.com (if thats what it is called. Signed up for dating sites (not many reply, its either my profile, or pictures (not the greatest or good looking guy but not horrible either).
I just keep thinking whats the point in life (I guess that is the biggest question everyone asks) .
As I said I have been this way for most of my life (with some good and some bad) but lately it has gotten worse and I feel like I am just going through the motions.
I have things I want to do (learn to play piano, take scuba diving lessons, rock climbing lessons, and much more) but either dont have someone to do it with (I wouldnt mind doing it alone but some things you need a partner for) or even something as simple as learning to juggle or just clean up my garage, but just do not feel like it and feel like whats the point.
NO worries no thoughts of suicide aside from thinking about it very briefly and rejecting the idea and it will never happen, if for the only reason so I am here for my kids.
I am shy until I get to know someone, and the weird part is I am more comfortable talking to women then men. I feel weird calling one of my guy friends and asking if they want to do something or jutst hang out/etc. This may come from working at a movie theater when I was younger mainly around girls/women or I just feel more comfortable around them. I have NO homophobic tenancies (I know (or knew) people that are gay and that does not bother me, it wouldnt bother me if someone was purple (I may look at them weird, but it wouldnt bother me).
So anyone going through something similar or have any suggestions or anything?
Thank You.
You are so blessed to be able to see your children and when you say that you don't get excited over seeing your children? How old are they? Are they old enough to learn how to rock climb? Can they go places with you that would make all of you happy? My ex husband taught my granddaughter how to scuba dive when she was 10 or 11. We are never too old or too young to learn new things and who better to learn with then your own children. If you are feeling that you aren't enjoying them like you use to, don't you know they feel that too coming from you? You mention all these things that you want to go out and learn to do, so go do it!! You will also meet new people that way too. And please don't put yourself down, okay? Hugs GB
Also try taking hot baths stretching etc. Things that help your nerves. You sound like you have over load going I am sorry to hear that HUGS!!
Yes you are right about kinda putting myself down.
I do enjoy the time with my kids but no where near as much as I want to or I think I "should". The same goes for everything else in my life (if I can get motivated or the energy to do anything. I feel like I should enjoy it a LOT more or at least a little.
When I finally do get motivated and start enjoying things it seems like the feeling goes away VERY quickly and I even take a downturn to be depressed vs. the normal state I am in which is "numb" (neither happy or sad, just there).
I am (and have been) in therapy for a LONG time and been on most every drug you can think of.
I am starting to try to find a specialist to hopefully help find more details that can help with what is actually going on.