gordo....please don't!
Please go to a therapist....talk this out....make a plan...proper medication maybe....:(

I feel so sad that you feel so desperate.

My friend I am so sorry you are at this difficult place in your life. Please don't take those pills as that could hand your sons a pain they will carry all their days. Suicide grief is the worst. Also if the overdose doesn't kill you it is quite possible that you could end up alive but disabled in frightening ways. It just isn't worth it. I agree with Misssy2--get some help. Faith is hard to be strong in when we feel so depressed. I deal with that too. Whatever failures you have had as a Mom are not going to be atoned for by ending it. They need you more than you know. Message me if you need to vent. I care and am praying for you.

It is the saddest feeling in the world to be in a long-term relationship, and yet to still feel so lonely and hopeless. I know, it's happening to me, too.

I've been really let down and abandoned by people who said words like 'forever', and, 'always', to me. But apparently their idea of forever is very different from mine. Because the minute I really needed them, out the door they fled. So, I'm also dealing with more disillusionment and disappointment than is really fair.

All I can say, when it comes down to brass tacks, is, EVERY LIFE HAS INTRINSIC WORTH.

Do not allow someone else's behaviour, especially that of selfish (or clueless) people, determine your self-worth.

And Do Not allow depression to lie to you and try to tell you how to proceed. Because it is a soul-stealer, mah dear.

Give yourself a chance to recover some balance, and get to a place where you can think a little more clearly.

DEFINITELY call a helpline, your therapist (if you are fortunate enough to have a good one), or a friend....and don't be afraid to open up about what's really getting to you.

I've been where you're at, sooooo many times lately. So I'm not just preachin' into the air. I know what it's all like, and so do many other people here.

((((massive huggggss!!!))))

Good on you for reaching out and expressing your frustration.

Fighting on is the only thing we can do, some days...........

This breaks my heart, puts things into perspective for me too. I don't want a single person on the planet to feel as lonely and hopeless and suicidal as I do so frequently. I wan't to fix this for you, tell you exactly what you need to hear. I want your partner to see you, hear you, know what you're going through so he/she can convince you that he/she really does care. Maybe your partner is scared, unsure how to reach out, or maybe he/she is just overwhelmed in day to day business. Either way, you matter, your sons need you. Lets keep fighting this together, please? It sucks so bad, it hurts so much, but please keep fighting for our children. HUGS!!!! I'm here if you ever want to chat.

No one can save you but yourself. Sounds like it's time to put yourself first in your life making yourself and your health your number one priority. Your husbands not going to help you or anyone else. Your post didn't say how old your sons are but you need to get away by yourself. Take a break from your normal life, take a vacation someplace exciting you've never been. Go to a beach take surfing lessons for a week. See if your life doesn't look completely different to you after that. Your husband is going to wake up and notice changes are being made and he might need to jump on board for the ride because you're enjoying your life now, smiling and having fun. OR... You can stay right in the place you are right now, take meds, but you will still be stuck in the same unhappy situation you're currently in, but medicated to make your unhappy world fuzzy enough to continue on with the life you're currently living.

Let us know how your are doing, I'm sure many are worried about you.

Please, Please don't do it! It's not worth, nothing is worth it. My heart goes out to you so much.....I am feeling your pain, I see my own mom go through the pain of not being a good mom. But you know what? were they good children to you? probably not. You had told me that parents are not perfect beings, in fact no one is perfect. I'm deeply sorry that your husband is not very supportive to you, that will probably made a difference with your emotions. Sometimes I wished my siblings were more supportive to my mom, if so she'll probably feel much better emotionally.

Please hang in there. You have several people on Daily Strength who loves you and don't want anything to happen to you.

I am checking myself into the hospital tomorrow. Probably should have done it on Friday.

I'm so glad you are going to check yourself in to a hospital.:(
I will be thinking of you.

You are strong to even know that you have to do this for yourself.
Best of luck...don't give up.
Let me know how you are as soon as you can.

I'm so glad you are checking yourself into the hospital. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

So glad you are checking yourself in to a hospital. And so sorry it has come to this point for you. I have been there many times myself so know that you are not alone and people here do understand.

Incredibly wise and humble decision bro! It is an answer to my prayers and I hope I will be one of the first ones you contact upon release. Sometimes just the act of reaching for help opens the very doors of heaven on our behalf and I know such will be the case for you.