YOU HAVE TAKEN THAT FIRST STEP BY COMING HERE & WRITING........ MAYBE IF U GOT BACK ON MEDS IT MITE BE DIFFERENT ONES THEY CAN TRY ON U SO UR NOT SO SCARED......TALK TO YOUR DR.... KEEP TALKING - WRITING & LOOKING FORWARD NOT BACKWARD...
(((((SOFT HUGS)))))).........

Def seek professional help! Depression can't be conquered alone! Good luck to u!

Things can really get better! I definitely think that seeking professional help would be good. Have you tried therapy before? That was really helpful to me. With the meds there may be a different one you could try that wouldn't have the side effects you went through last time. Also keep writing in your journal and post here whenever you'd like support too! I'm glad you've found this site and hope it helps at least a little bit.

I do understand anger and the desire to do nothing but stew in my own negative emotions. I've felt that way many, many times going back over fifteen years. There are many ways to approach the treatment of depression. I'm sure that one - or some combination - of those treatments will help you. There is a way through this for you; you just have to keep looking.

I think a combination of therapy and meds would be very helpful. I had to try a few before I got the right type and dosage. It literally saved my life. I have anxiety and depression so therapy has helped me understand it and learn some coping skills.

I agree with everyone else. A combo. Talk therapy is #1 in my book. Its scary taking the meds. i remember when i first started..all the side effects.sometimes i felt like a guinea pig! But sometimes you have to do a little testing before you find the right fit. It sucks, I know.
If I were you I'd give them another shot. I was on and off them several times throughout many years. It helps if you get a good psychatrist...which may take some digging, but would be worth it.
Whatever you decide I hope you find something that works for you.

Get some professional help babe. I am depressed as well so I do know what it feels like but for me it is what people call 'situational' or 'environmental' depression which if I can just change a few aspects of my life I will be back on track. Some people though, suffer from chronic depression and need to be balanced out with medication and learn tools on how to cope with the extreme lows by talking to somebody who is qualified to teach these things. Writing on DS can be a fantastic outlet as well and people here are wise and experienced in life..they usually can provide MANY perspectives that can help point you in the right direction. Good luck dear.

I completely understand how you feel. That's exactly how I feel at this moment. Walking around every numb and with a knot in your through because you are ready to cry at any moment. I have also come to the point of seeking medical help. I have always held back because I am afraid to go on medication. I have given medication for anxiety a few years ago..ever took it either. I am here if you need to talk :)

I agree with poppiesroses. A combination of therapy and medication is a must. For me, I had to go on the medication first to get out of my whole and clear my mental haze and that allowed me to see how crucial therapy was. If you find a good match in your therapist, you can make really good progress. It has helped me IMMENSELY so far. (Very hard work though).
You should talk openly and honestly with your doc and tell them your concerns and history. There are lots of options out there for meds, and lots that have minimal side effects.
I hope you get the help you need.