Wow. Sorry jaime, but he sounds like a man with some major issues. I know that you can't receive this now, but I think you won out! I understand wanting him and her to hurt and wanting him to leave her. Hell I did everything within my power to come between my ex and the girl that he left me for. I was at his house one time to retrieve something for my son. This was before they had really moved in together and she would call him from her late shift job. Well jaime, I got to thinking, and pondering and the more I did the madder I got. And that's when the idea hit me..................

While he wasn't looking, I picked up the phone and had all his calls forwarded to MY house. I got home and around 11:30 12:00 the show is about to begin! The phone rings, I pick it up and in a sleepy voice I answered,"Hello"? She was stunned. She asked for him and I told her that we had just put the baby down and we were in bed! I was laughing my a$$ off! I cancelled his jobs when they called the next day and everything! However..........

They figured it out. They still got together. The point I'm trying to make is NONE! Sometimes you just need a little girlfriend talk!

But seriously jaime, don't take up too much of your time worried about what their futures are going to be. I promise you that you'll look back one day and wish for these years. You're going to feel like crap, you're going to be mad. Just don't let it consume you. You do not want to look up and realize that all these opportunities have passed. You might be blocking the real winner from coming in. You're ex is the loser in this one. DON'T let him play you like this too much longer. I mean having your thoughts and all. Dragging you down. Do you want to trade places with me? Fat,42 and broke? If you don't watch out it will be you. #experiencetalking Do what you have to do to get your thinking straight. Meds, therapy, whatever. Then think about what YOU want GOOD in your life.

I've already let it get me like that sweetie. I look back at pictures of me from 3 years ago.....smiling, genuinely smiling! 30lbs lighter, vibrant to say the least. Now here I am. 37 years old. My face actually feels weird when something makes me laugh. Seriously.. Genuine smiles? I forgot how to do those. I have developed these horrid wrinkles on my forehead that no longer go away when I am not frowning. Crows feet. Muffin top. Meds and meds and more meds trying to get something that helps but have not found it yet. Low paying job. Low income housing. Court dates left and right form creditors suing me. I'm pretty much screwed. So now I must ask...how do I get out of this depression when everything in my life sucks so bad. Who is ever going to love me now?

YOU. I'm talking from experience jaime. No need for another woman not to gain something from my losses. Your depression and anxiety will distort things and make everything seem so hopeless and neverfnding. But had I just kept on searching, kept on pushing, I see now that things would have changed. I should have fought hard to get the medication and therapy that I neede, but I didn't and left untreated.....it can get out of hand. Try to focus on what you have to offer besides the physical and material. I know that sounds crazy right now, but just pick out something. Do you make a good peanut butter and jelly sandwich? If so, hell you're a good cook! You have managed to continue to work even through all of this mess. Do I really have to post on here how many jobs I lost because I was crying all the time or I just didn't go? I know thst you said you didn't work today, ok, ok. Everyone needs a personal day or two. Hell I needed a week off one time. But there's some fight still left in you.

Crow's feet can be fixed. Botox is getting cheaper and cheaper these days. The best accessory that I've seen a woman carry is confidence. Weird word isn't it? But I've found that some women that I thought were not all that cute kept getting all the positives in life. They all had confidence not only in their looks, but also in their abilities. Jaime, you can come out of this depression with help and support. Remember to be kind to yourself and allow yourself to feel the emotion. It's okay. Doesn't mean you're not okay, it just wasn't your day. Creditors. Let'em sue. File bankruptcy, whatever you need to do to START OVER. Think of this as a new start for you and the kids. Are you worried about the men not being interested because of your financial situation? Then find yourself a breadwinner! You better check out sugardaddies.com! Lol! Crow's feet? Date up. Some of these older men don't look too bad these days. Anyway you don't want a man below 45 anyway.

Seriously, you can't snap out of this, but you can start laying a foundation for the future. And yes there is a future. Consider me a time traveller, I've already been there.

If you end up pushing people away after a while and are scared to hang out with them in the first place. This board will definately help for a good while but for face to face help outside of a psychiatrist office I would recommend doing meet up groups. It's sorta like going to a prearranged meeting of strangers only you are there to get to know each other on either a community level or a personal level. For example one meet up group may be devoted to D and D another hiking or Reiki etc. www.meetup.com
Some people only go once or twice a month as they are incredibly busy with life. Some meetup people go alot. Either way this site has a lot of interests and people usually meet in public places. Hope your new year is a good one Cheers!

I really admire your strength after all this problem.

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