Ever since I have started college my anxiety has skyrocketed into an obliverating madness I cannot control. Each day is a new challenge to face and I am lucky that I have made it 18 years. Panic attacks have become my daily routine and I dont know when It will end. The moment of panic occurs when I get one simple thought of insecurity then it just rises from there. My mind starts racing and racing until I feel so dizzy I cannot stand or look straight. The skin on my face transforms from olive to pale to red. I began to hold my breathe and my face turns magenta. Gravity in my head mutiplies by a thousand and my brain feels like it was ran over. My eyes turn into waterfalls of tears greater than anything nature could come up with. Time begins to pause and the gravity is pulling me down. I wobble over to the mirror and look at this monster that I don't recognize. She stares back begging for help, but the more I stare the worse it gets. I began to get a sort of pleasure from the way the oxygen is leaking out of my face. After I can't take the pressure from holding my breathe I gasp for air as if I have been drowning for years. I am exhausted with a tear dried face. I feel relieved its over, but still sad. As I drift off I have the best nights sleep ever, it rejuvenates me. As my eyes blink while I awake the next day I feel weak. I look and the mirror and it looks like I was in a fight or like I was dying in a movie and someone paused at the wrong moment. It really disgusts me that I have the potential to do this to myself. Please help.