Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
i dont know how to start this so here it goes. im most likely going to kill myself on tuesday. i know how monday is going to go and im already low as it is. i cant take it any more so im writing this prehand.
im done crying im done shuffling my feet. im finished with hearing people talk behind my back. im tired of bein a failure. im done trying to get peoples antention so i feel as if someone hears me. i cant do it i cant go on ive known for sometime this day will come.
all this is, is a giant sign saying michael mason is going to kill himself in the next few days.
unfortantly the people who i want to read it wont so i give it to the you to read. i dont care how you judge me i dont care if you reply or not this is a way for me to let someone know what is going to happen.
this is only to let you know if i put up a reply tomorow then you will know that i survived and will be fine and most likely be able to go on stronger then ever. if i dont then monday was as predicted and my fate sealed.
(sadly after re-reading this it sounds more selfcenterd then what i originaly attented.)
im done crying im done shuffling my feet. im finished with hearing people talk behind my back. im tired of bein a failure. im done trying to get peoples antention so i feel as if someone hears me. i cant do it i cant go on ive known for sometime this day will come.
all this is, is a giant sign saying michael mason is going to kill himself in the next few days.
unfortantly the people who i want to read it wont so i give it to the you to read. i dont care how you judge me i dont care if you reply or not this is a way for me to let someone know what is going to happen.
this is only to let you know if i put up a reply tomorow then you will know that i survived and will be fine and most likely be able to go on stronger then ever. if i dont then monday was as predicted and my fate sealed.
(sadly after re-reading this it sounds more selfcenterd then what i originaly attented.)
1 i will fail a class which i need to pass so i can continue with my degree but i cant afford to retake it cause i couldnt afford it actualy i dont know how ill afford my next round of classes. on its own i would be ok but combined with other issues im still faced to deal with its a hard one to over look, it means a great deal to me just to pass and i dont accept failure easily. i did call a help line and i got an apointment tomorow.
2 i knew i was going to fail and cause that teacher in question does not help anyone for anything its hard to pass when all she does is give you assignments that have nothing to do with her tests or the class and actualy only 7 out of 26 people passed her class.
3 no chelalis is far south from me and i think thats the right spelling not sure.
4 if there was 1 word to describe my life it would be this, push on till tomorow push on till the next day and its not a trance or a hit of depression its something a bit bigger then that and i wish i had a way to make myself get up again but after 12 years of doing nothing but pushing myself forward and not feeling like anything worth while has been accomplished i still am not sure.
im not sure about what ill do tomorow i have a lot to do and not enough time to finish it all. i know it sounds weird but the second hardest thing i have ever done in my life was to write what i wrote earlier. it took me almost 3 days of thinking it through and trying to convince myself that saying something would be better then saying nothing at all. then guilt of reading all the replies hit so i decided to reply to them. idk i feel better after all of that but i still fear of what i might do. idk only time will tell if everything ive done will be worth it in the end and i hope im making the write decision by starying alive.