Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
Last year was bad enough,but this year I'm in worse shape than I was last year.My wife and I are both unemployed and I have no money left.We will be living in the r/v by Christmas and I am more depressed than I ever thought I could be.It started this morning when everybody started talking about shopping and who they had left to shop for.How do you deal with the holiday's?I need help.I'm watching the news right now with people smiling and shopping there ass off.I get the meaning of black friday now.
I'm not Christian so I'm not going to turn this into a religious "Jesus is the reason" message. Actually the reason, I think, is togetherness, and family. I have had neither really for five years running now. No presents to open on Christmas morning. Last year I had not one present at all.
First suggestion. If watching TV gets you down, don't watch. In the olden days before the commercialism and before TV families cozied up together and roasted chestnuts and popcorn, and maybe had apple cider. If they were lucky enough to have some kind of feast on Christmas day--they feasted. Otherwise they simply gave thanks for the food they did have.
Don't compare yourselves to others. The TV isn't going to show you all the people in homeless shelters, or all the children who only get one present because of some gifts for children drive. The TV isn't going to show all the people living in abandoned houses or cardboard boxes. Nor will it show the really poor people who still manage to donate a bit to someone even poorer still.
You know what? This Christmas sucks for you and so does last Christmas. But it is only one day, and you still have a roof over your head and each other to talk to. You are not alone. There will be happier Christmases again eventually, and these not so happy ones will actually make those future happier Christmases even happier, because you will even more appreciate all you have.
Hang in there. Stop looking at all the pretend people on TV, the extras, the actors, the programming that makes you feel like a failure because THAT ISN'T YOU. Holy shit--it's not a lot of us right now. So many of us are not like what you see on TV anymore.
Savor every little nice thing. Don't look at what you don't have, look at what you've got. Get or make one nice thing for each other as a gift. You know, what men don't get, but most women do....if a woman receives even just a card from her man with a note he himself wrote, expressing his heart--that to her is better than most any other gift a man can give. I'm not kidding. My husband (ex now) once brought me home a car for Valentines day. That sounds like a big deal but I was going to get a car anyway-he used it as a replacement for a card or flowers. Know what? I found myself wishing for a card. I kept thinking, ok, but where's my card? Where's the little thing that made it from HIM? That told me he CARED? That made me feel loved? Even if all you can do for your wife is get or make her a card with a message of your love in it--trust me, that will warm her heart more than most any "gift" ever could.
Many hugs to you. Trust me, it isn't just you. We're all feeling it. Our economy is taking a nose dive and dragging us all with it. :(
I'm over the charge card thing. Last year after Christmas I got the best tree I ever had, it is 6 1/2 feet tall and really full. It was $200.00 on sale for $46.00. I also got a bunch of those pretty square Christmas christmas boxes that they sale for five and six dollors, for a dollor. Now don't laught about this part. This year I have my tree up and it looks great. They have so many boxes under it and it look like we are going to have a great christmas to every one. Now here is the funny part, all the boxes are empty (lol)
They took the meaning of Christmas away. They want everyone in the stores buying. they do not care if you have the money or not. Here open up a charge card account you will save 10% on every thing you buy. Everyone is caught up into all that. What they do not realize at the time is yea I'm going to save 10% but must places charger 15% or more interest. It funny how they forget to tell you that part. It all about them making money. They do not care if it going to take you two years to pay it off. they do not care if you have a job or food to put on the table. They are laughting at us. Most people probably can not even remember what they got last year. kids do not even play with the toys you spend your hard earn money on. These are the fact of christmas.
The meaning of Christmas is not buying. It about love and family. It also is about giving, but it the small things that count. They best thing you can give you wife is the card and spending time with her. Be happy and enjoy the day.
Remember that you have a wife and family. You can walk,talk, feed and dress yourself. Those are things to really be grateful for. Sit out side and enjoy the nice trees. I ove watching birds, the sounds of birds. The freash air and the beautiful air.
For Christmas we spend time together, playing cards and just relaxing. I'm grateful I still have my mom. She knows I do not have the money. I still have a job but now I make $500.00 a month less and have tons of billes already. All she really wants for Christmas is a hug, a kiss and us spending time with her. Well I hope this make you feel a little better. Take care and have a great month, enjot the things everyone takes for granted.
If you feel better soon could you do some volunteer work some where to help you feel a little better? I know a lot of people here have done this and it has helped them through the holidays..
Sending positive thoughts, prayers and mojo
You are married? Yeah!
You have a trailer? You are doing great!
Starbuck62 has said it well....look at what you have...our lives are a series of wonderful small moments that we remember long past the holiday.
You have some good advice here. I'm glad you seem to have listened and are making a change in your attitude. That is so important when we are depressed. We can change how we think about things and turn our lives around.
Good luck and God bless.
Just get together to enjoy whatever meal you can afford. Christmas is Christ's birthday, not stuffing the stockings with goodies, and how we celebrate Christ's birth is by being kind to each other. You and your husband have each other. That is enough. Turn off the TV, with its incessant, cheerful ads, that are making you feel inferior, light a fire, and curl up together next to it.