Hello Invisible... Understand self hate very well...I have problems with poor self talk and know I need help to change these deep seated beliefs. Have you tried Cognitive Behavioural Therapy? I am currently waiting to start this type of therapy and I hear it's very effective. Peace, Love & Lights at you!!!

It grieves me that this post has not been answered for a day. That is just wrong. My friend, I have a list of negatives about my thoughts, words, and actions that stretches back to a delinquent childhood. I could (AND HAVE) pull it out and begin to crucify myself too, but what does that gain? Has that ever made you feel good? Isn't the core problem that you are obsessed over any negative thought about yourself? My wife and I were just discussing how good you are about reaching out to hurting people, even when you are suffering severely. Why don't you make a list about how you have held down a job for a long time and haven't killed yourself despite truly wanting to many, many times. That is the list I think of when I think of you. It has been an honor to be let a little bit into your world. I am always here for you. Hugs.

What do you love about yourself honey. I know there's something good that you see, even a tiny thing. Are you a good listener? Are you loving? A good cook? Funny?

Everyone has beauty and I know you do. Depression seems to put the blinkers on.

Do you get counselling? Cognitive behavioural therapy really helped me and myself esteem and self worth.

What do you think makes a person worth loving? Why don't you fit into that category?

Everyone's annoying sometimes, everyone has physical flaws, a lot of people are long term single that doesn't make you a freak I promise, everyone thinks negative things about others. I'm sure you talk fine. None of these things are worthy of your hate.

Sweetheart,

You Do NOT Annoy Anyone. And You Are NOT A Freak.
Depression can cause our vision to become distorted.

Please Try To See Just How Beautiful And Wonderful You Really Are.

((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))) Honey

That's a great idea SteveBHopes had to write down all the awesome things about you. From what he said you sound pretty awesome to me!

I am not a stranger to feeling that way, especially if I am in the grips of depression. I don't know what to tell you. You never know when the right man is around the corner. I do know that you can't expect someone to love you when you don't love yourself. Are you seeing a therapist or someone that could teach you self love?

I can relate exactly to what you are saying. I also do not know how to change these thoughts. I guess we need to counter these thoughts with more positive ones otherwise the negative thoughts seem or are more likely to become reality.

Think the way you are judging yourself...would you judge someone else like this? Be gentle with yourself, you are special even if you don't feel it.

Thank you everyone I used to do Councilling both one on one and group I just find it really hard to talk to people and more so trust.
I always think people are being fake nice to me or probably thinking something bad of me this probably comes from being bullied so badly all my life and teasing and just life and people have not been to nice. I still love people but it's hard to believe anyone cod like me or even live.

i too struggle to like myself, to even tolerate myself. let alone believe that anyone else would find me worthy of love or positive regard. i can even makes lists of my positive characteristics without feeling any better 'bout myself. if u find anything that helps, please share. ur not alone in feeling this way...

Haven't really found anything that helps. I Too think of thIngs that I may be good at but it doesn't seem to make me feel better I just don't believe it anything positive

Invisible,

I am you and have been for many years now...
Your comment "I always think people are being fake nice to me" is exactly what I think when people say great things about me...

What can we do??

>>What can we do??

Read up on 'self esteem'. CHOOSE to be good to yourself. There is no love for those who do not love themselves.

Self love is the core of ALL happiness. Learn to do it ... CHOOSE to do it.

Hi there invisible....I am so sorry you have these feelings. I think I was one of the lucky ones in that even when my depression was at it's worst, I didn't deal with this type of thing, and I know it is very common amongst depressed people.

As far as the specifics you gave, I hope it's ok if I ask/comment on them individually....

Hate my looks

**What about your looks to you hate?


Hate my bad thoughts of others that I don't even know why it gets in my head

**I have a feeling the bad thoughts you have of others that you cannot explain is a reflection off of your self hate.


Hate the way I talk

**Do you mean your voice, or the way you talk to others? If it's your voice, I can relate (I think most people can). I don't think I have ever met anyone who likes the sound of their own voice lol


The way I annoy people

**What makes you think this? Do they tell you that you annoy them, or do you just *get that feeling*?


The way that I'm a freak andnever have a man

**Well, there are many people who are single. Your worth should not be dependent on being with someone. I think you would be much better off being single until you can learn to love yourself a bit more.


You have much worth and I hope that you will realize this as you go on. Not everyone who is nice to you or treats you nice is being fake. I DO believe there are people out there that tell others what they think they want to hear, or are fake, but there are just as many who are truly sincere. There really is no way to tell which is which, unless you know them personally, but why not go with believing them until you have a reason not to!!

*Hugs* and I truly do hope you start seeing yourself in a better light!

SENDING YOU MORE OF MY HUGGLES N CUDDLES

i hate that stupid jerk that lives in my head. the jerk makes me hate me. i squash it every chance i get, but it comes back. Positie thinking, acknowledging your accomplishments is a good hatred squashier. I pat myself on the back for things like washing the dishes. It is small but it helps.

Many hugs to yu