Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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Guilt and Shame

DepressedRecluse
DepressedRecluse
Yesterday, I posted quite a bit about how I have no feelings...I continue thinking and my brain keeps cycling through my mantras, thoughts, beliefs ect...and I am reminded how I messed up and failed...and how everything is just f'ed up!...then I remember the definitions and differences between these two words: Guilt and Shame...

GUILT: bad feelings about the things we do ...

SHAME: bad feelings about who we are...

well what do you know! I do have feelings...I have bad feelings of GUILT and SHAME!...

and now that I know what's wrong (it only took about 30 days to figure it out) I need to figure out how to get over these negative feelings and get back to being the person I was...the person I AM. I wonder how long that will take...I really don't have that kind of free time to just waste...

so? any ideas on how to get over these feelings of GUILT and SHAME?
deleted_user
deleted_user
i did something a while back. it was very hard. it was self forgiveness. the words seem rather plain and normal. but how do we really forgive ourself. I was amazed that i didnt know how.. so i woke up one morning and did my own guided meditation and let go of a TON of stuff i was holding onto.. it was truly amazing.

your posting here is the first intentenal step... it will happen
Heidiclark
Heidiclark
I carry around a lot of feelings of guilt and shame too. I think depressed people often have trouble letting go and forgiving themselves for various reasons. Let's hope we both find a way to get through these feelings so we can have a better life. Maybe we should try Mike's idea.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I wish I could let go...and forgive myself for the choices I have made...unfortunately I"m just not there yet. I hope one day... if not for myself but for my children....than maybe than they can see me for who I use to be and not who I am today. I so desprately want that for them and myself....maybe one day...I am so glad for Mike as he has been able to reach this
deleted_user
deleted_user
Guilt and shame are valid feelings because feelings are always valid but guilt and shame are not always justified. Meaning, the reasons for feeling guilty and/or ashamed aren't always justified. Feelings are always okay but sometimes they're detrimental to our mental health (like guilt and shame) and we just beat ourselves up.

I don't really know how to "get over" anything but for me, reminding myself that my guilt and shame aren't really justified helps. I hope that helps you too.