It sounds like you have anxiety since you are up thinking/worrying constantly.. do you write these things down??

Also, don't let a late start discourage you. Maybe you can sleep til noon and still accomplish some of the things you planned. Little things here and there... leave gaps in between your 'schedule' so you also have down time and don't feel overwhelmed.

have you tried Melatonin ---

What is melatonin?
Melatonin is a hormone made by the pineal gland , a small gland in the brain. Melatonin helps control your sleep and wake cycles. Very small amounts of it are found in foods such as meats, grains, fruits, and vegetables. You can also buy it as a supplement.

What does natural melatonin do in the body?
Your body has its own internal clock that controls your natural cycle of sleeping and waking hours. In part, your body clock controls how much melatonin your body makes. Normally, melatonin levels begin to rise in the mid- to late evening, remain high for most of the night, and then drop in the early morning hours.

Light affects how much melatonin your body produces. During the shorter days of the winter months, your body may produce melatonin either earlier or later in the day than usual. This change can lead to symptoms of seasonal affective disorder (SAD), or winter depression.

Natural melatonin levels slowly drop with age. Some older adults make very small amounts of it or none at all.

Why is melatonin used as a dietary supplement?
Melatonin supplements are sometimes used to treat jet lag or sleep problems (insomnia). Scientists are also looking at other good uses for melatonin, such as:

Treating seasonal affective disorder (SAD).
Helping to control sleep patterns for people who work night shifts.
Preventing or reducing problems with sleeping and confusion after surgery.
Reducing chronic cluster headaches.
It may be that melatonin, when taken as a supplement, can stop or slow the spread of cancer, make the immune system stronger, or slow down the aging process. But these areas need more research.

Melatonin is also being studied to see if it can be used to treat sleep problems in people who are blind.1 Since these people cannot see light, they may have sleep problems such as sleeping during the day and being awake at night.

Is taking a melatonin dietary supplement safe?
In most cases, melatonin supplements are safe in low doses for short-term and long-term use. But be sure to talk with your doctor about taking them.

Children and pregnant or nursing women should not take melatonin without talking to a doctor first.

Melatonin does have side effects. But they will go away when you stop taking the supplement. Side effects may include:

Sleepiness.
Lower body temperature.
Vivid dreams.
Morning grogginess.
Small changes in blood pressure.
If melatonin makes you feel drowsy, do not drive or operate machinery when you are taking it.

During health exams, tell your doctor if you are taking melatonin. And tell your doctor if you are having trouble sleeping (insomnia), because it may be related to a medical problem.

In adults, melatonin is taken in doses from 0.2 to 20.0 mg, based on the reason for its use. The right dose varies widely from one person to another. Talk to your doctor to learn the right dosage and to find out if melatonin is right for you.

Where can you find melatonin as a supplement?
You can buy melatonin supplements without a prescription at health food stores, drugstores, and online. Melatonin should only be taken in its man-made form. The form that comes from ground-up cow pineal glands is rarely used, because it may spread disease.

http://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/tc/melatonin-overview

trying something for sleep is a good idea. The melatonin works pretty good like someone suggested.
also if you can afford it .....buying a small handheld tape recorder and bring it to bed with you and as the thoughts come, say them into the recorder or a cheaper way is to have a notebook and pen ready. Sometimes when I'm really stressed and all the thoughts come flooding this helps me a little. Many nights I also have to get up and have trouble sleeping too.

Thanks for the support guys.

I tried...but it just isn't working...I went to sleep after I posted this and ended up tossing and turning for a while then fell asleep...I just woke up and well, I just feel so damn screwed up.

I walked through my kitchen to the bathroom, and saw the mess in there...and of course it made me feel worse.

I just want to push everyone ... and I do mean EVERYONE very far away from me...I don't feel worthy....I'm even pushing GOD away....and my kitty cat....she was sleeping in the bathroom...and didn't even look up at me when I went in there...We just bought her some new food that I thought she would like, and apparently she doesn't like it so now she is mad at ME...and I don't blame her. Its my fault she's hungry.

I am so... oh by the way...I did read your suggestions...I tried the late start thing but obviously that didn't work...I do think I need to do one thing at a time...but I can't get started on ONE thing...because it is all overwhelming....as for melatonin, I have heard about it since I went through last summer without sleeping at all (severe insomnia) ...I'm yawning...but I know if I go back to sleep, I will NOT sleep tonight!!! Anyway, heard about it but haven't tried the melatonin...don't have the money...I also like the idea of the recorder or writing things down....i have the ability to do both on my smart phone but I just don't ...oh....how I want this all to just be over...I really can not go on living this way!!!

once again, thanks for the support...but I think I'll just go back to bed now. Not that it will do me any good, but oh well...who cares!!!

sorry to bother you guys again...I just thought I'd let you know I'm gonna go try to fix me something to eat....maybe then I'lll have the energy to do something...like clean the kitchen...or wash the dishes at least. I don't know...EVERYTHING JUST FEELS SO DAUNTINGLY OVERWHELMING!!!!

UGH!

Sending my love and support and prayers. Curious -Have you spoken with a doctor to help with your sleep? You are beautiful and strong!

Focus on small details that soothe you- your cat purring, the view from a window in your home, a hot cup of tea.

I have a lot of sleep/insomnia issues and started taking Melatonin about a month ago and it has helped a lot. You get it at the drug store and it was like $14 for a 6 month supply, so not too expensive. I highly recommend you try it and see if it helps. My sleep has been much better. At first I took it every night - for about a week - until I felt back on track, but now I'm taking it like every other night or just when I think I need it.

Be VERY CAREFUL with MELATONIN. It increased my depression.

I can so relate to your feelings of being overwhelmed by even the seemingly smallest of things. I finally did the dishes-it took a month. Not that there were that many since I hardly ate at all-and the little I did eat most of it was not at home. It only took an hour to load the dishwasher and wash the few other items after that-but just to get to that point was an immense uphill battle. Then of course there is the guilt about not being able to get going-which I am very good about beating myself up over...it is like you are writing my story, singing my song. While I do not wish this on anyone, it helps to know that I am not some freaked out weirdo and there are other people that can understand what I am going through-because they are in the same/similar boat. Sometimes I can't even answer the door or phone when people try to check one me. I feel so ashamed about that. Sorry for crying my own blues all over yours. I do have melatonin and will try it.

d1...
Please don't feel bad on my account...We are going through the same thing...I do the same thing...I don't answer my door or my phone or check my email...I just want to get away from everyone and be left alone. I hate these feelings...