Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
All my experience says I should be feeling somewhat better by now. The pain shouldn't be so sharp, I shouldn't be crying everyday, I should start to resume "normal" actvities like watching tv, listening to music, taking a shower. I should be able to clean my apt and not have it look like a pig sty the next day. I should be able to move on to other things in my life. I just can't. I'm just absolutely too broken up, too depressed about this.
I loved him so much. More than any man I've ever loved. The year and a half before he cheated was the best time of my life. I was looking forward to our future. Hell, I woke up looking forward to every day. I truly felt that, for once, I got it right.
At first I was so angry, and so full of adrenaline that I was super woman. Throw the bum out, get rid of the reminders, block him from my life. The first week or so I was amazed at how tough I was being. I felt empowered. Oh, I cried and all that, but that was to be expected, after all, I did deeply care about him, but I was plowing through the devastation.
More recently, though...I feel like I'm falling apart. A little more each day. Every day there's a little less of me that wants to stick around for this crap of a life. OK, I have the added stress of my daughter's problems and illness on top of this, but at the end of the day it's missing him, missing our life, missing my dreams that is really tearing at me. It's realizing that he's gone that punches me in the chest each morning. It's all the little stupid things that happen each day, like finding something of his, or hearing a song that tears at me that start me crying. Last night I found myself thinking that if I died, the money my daughter got would pay off her debts and drs bills, and, with her aunt and brother's help help her turn her life around. And wouldn't that be worth it? This life I have sucks. It's too empty, too lonely, too painful, and I don't see it getting better, no matter what I try. Wouldn't it be better to give my daughter a chance to be happy? Wouldn't saving her mean more than me just feeling empty the rest of my life?
I'm not thinking of hurting myself, but hey, if I was hit by a bus or something.....wouldn't that be better for everyone than me walking around feeling half dead?
Please hang in there better days are ahead.
Okay,. Let me tell you why you are hurting soooooooooooooooooooooo bad- and its bad
because you have a number of posts. Okay- you are focusing from the outside in. Your looking at what he did, what he meant what he said what your missing about him. What about you, Why exactly after all this
time and after your marriages is there a pattern? What is going on deep inside of you?. Because there
is something going on. Why are you still partnering with pain and not self partnering with yourself to
guide you out of pain. Do you have a photo of yourself- the cutest one you can find.Put in on your night table.
Look at it. Hold it and talk to her. Tell her what you are sorry for- what happened when you were younger-
any issues with abandonment-What about yourself were you skeptical about? Let me tell you girl- Your
marriages and relationships are more so to reveal things within YOU, not the other person. You should
be wondering about you and being at peace with and within yourself. Being honest and upfront with yourself.
About the picture in the frame. Look at the picture- and know that you are accountable to her. Tell her you
love her and if you made any bad choices out of fear or deep rooted child issues that you are willing to
take a look at these things , uproot them, discard them and tell yourself that it is okay . The Universe is
actually waiting on you-.There are reasons that we have co-dependency issues. For me it is actually
because I have empathetic tendencies.I can be overly sensitive. You have - because we all have to do inner
work. Talking to that picture of yourself and loving her first and uncovering her deepest fears is called self healing. Uprooting these fears can be done with Quantum Healing. You cannot hold onto emotional residue
especially if the Universe did not ordain the union. This means that it is rightly so for him to embark on his
journey and to release you and it is rightly so for you to embark on your journey and for you to release him.
You cant be grabbing on emotionally and frantically and expect to have open ready arms to allow the Universe
to gift you for what is yours. Embark on your personal journey to self heal and self partner with love. You get over these things but the method is self loving yourself through it. If you love yourself and know that you are worth it then stop crying- Open your loving arms and Release him back into the universe bravely.Create
this affirmation and then the Universe will follow you- because now you are in you guessed it Perfect Alignment. A beautiful life and journey lies ahead please for your beautiful sake please dont make the mistake
to miss out.Love Hugs Positive Vibes, Healing, Bright Energy, your way
I pray that you will not lose hope knowing that this season is not forever and things will get better if you don't give up. Try to surround yourself with positive people that will love to see you happy and full of hope. Please update us, take care of yourself. God bless.