well, from what i hear (because i wouldn't personally know) true happiness has to come from within. i think money, shopping, other people, etc etc are only temporary fixes.....for some people.

i hate shopping, i hate money, and people scare me....well not ALL people. but i do find i am happiest when i'm proud of MYSELF.

so i guess, if i were to give any suggestions....it would be to challenge yourself. do something out of the ordinary. maybe sign up for a course in something that interests you or start hiking, or something like that.

good luck and hugs!

i know exactly how you feel.
i bought an ipod last month and ended up returning it.
i need a new cell phone too but i don't want to spend the money.
i still drive a car that's almost considered a classic (i'm sort of excited about this given it's in good condition yet)
like jeccles, i hate shopping, esp. for clothes.

in addition to depression, i'm attributing some of this to age and maybe pre-menopause (i'm 45).

you're describing the classic symptoms of depression.
you have to do things for yourself that YOU enjoy, and are condusive to a healthy lifestyle.

maybe make a list of things that make you happy and try each day to do a few of those things. sounds simplistic, but it does work.

i have to tell myself all the time to stay in the moment. no one is happy all the time, it's not human nature, but we can do things to reduce the stress and negativity in our personal lives.

a hug for you.

thanks for your replys...

jeccles
i'm like you...the happiest i've been was in may 2000 when i graduated from college and left to spend a week in ny city the next day...

i was so proud of myself for realizing two goals in one week...i'm not one to smile very much...but that weekend you couldn't stop me from smiling...

as for this depression thing...it's really bad...i went through this for three months in 2008 after quitting my job...not quite sure how i overcame it...but i did...and i was doing good... and in the fall of 20009, iwent back to school...and started working on another life long goal...which i know i can accomplish...if i can get over this damn depression!...i started slipping during thanksgiving break...and now between the spring semester and summer semester...this depression thing is really bad!!!!!

GOD...i don't know what to do anymore...
i don't even want to eat...bought some food for my son and got me something...i ate it but i didn't enjoy it...i can't even think of something i enjoy write now...i start to think and just start thinking negatively...

Depressed Recluse :(

and it doesn't help that my SO is going through the same thing..but he won't admit..
and doesn't do anything to even try to fix it...

me...i don't know what to do...and even if i did, i don't think i have the energy to do it...

i'm sorry...i'm just rambling on making no sense...

i don't know what to do anymore...

Maybe that smart phone is not what you really want and only what you think you should want. Society tells us to spend, spend, spend and get more, more, more when really what you may need is a drive or escape to the country for a weekend to recharge. Somewhere inside us we know what could make us happy, just got to listen for it and to it. Starts out by being grateful for what you do have and going from there. I hope you and your SO can talk and be a support to eachother, sounds like you both need that. I hope you can be happier soon.

I don't know if you're on an anti depressant or not but if you are I think it's either not working for you or you need to talk to your dr about increasing the dose. If you're not then sounds like you'd do well to see your dr about getting on one. I mean you're talking classic depression here. Perhaps some coundeling would help if you're not already into that.

Ya know I've been that bad myself and I can't even remember what if anything I did to improve. But I can remember a time when I'd set and watch ppl talking a laughing and wonder how on earth they did that. It was very puzzling to me.

I hope you find some ansswers. (((((hugs)))))