I understand how you feel and I'm so sorry you are in that dark place. Your husband and children cherish and need you, failures and all. I know no words can take away what you're feeling. Sending you love and peace.

I can so relate to your situation. Depression has left me unable to function and barely able to talk. My 18 year old son has never seen me have a normal day although I do try to fake it for everyone'should benefit.

What is the life you wanted? How can you make that life happen? Form a plan to make the life you wanted as its still possible, make the plan, and then make your plan happen by taking one step at a time. You can make life whatever you want it to be, just decide in your head and then take the steps, make the choices and make life what you want it to be. You are not a failure, what is failure anyways? If you have decided on what failure is to you then choose to change, do the opposite of whatever it is that is making you feel you are failing. Or simply change your definition of failure and let go of thinking you are a failure. Instead focus on the things that make you happy and do more of that, think of the things that make those you love happy and do more of that.

Thank you, just what I needed to hear.

Lol don't flatter yourself as we say here....

You're a bit player in their lives, you just don't carry that much responsibility. :) :D :)

You'll have a formative effect on the kids, but ultimately you're just grist for their mills. They'll learn about human nature from you, and that's normal.

Parents don't have to be perfect. They just have to do their best. That's their personal best in their personal circumstances, not somebody else's.

xx